sometimes it just overwhelms me

I am so so so so so so so so SOOOOOOO TOTALLY BLESSED to have Verlander. He is so wonderful and amazing and important and truely irreplacable to me. Just being around him makes me feel good. He's so supportive and loving and caring and giving. And I'm not saying he's perfect or flawless, but with magnitude of his goodness, you forget any flaws, they just fall away. I can't believe how much our relationship has evolved in the last five years and I'm so completely floored that I am still as in love with this man as when I first laid eyes on him in that store that day in 02. And our family is stronger because of our love. We're teaching our kids how to love. With honesty, understanding, compassion, (passion), forgiveness, LOYALTY, fidelity, and humor.
I'm just overcome by the wonderfulness of it all sometimes. And of course, our financial satuts has always left something to be desired....but I JUST KNOW that if we did have complete financial security-we'd have it ALL. Love, knowledge, and strong, committed family.....all the things that people struggle with-we'd have it ALL and God's not ready to let me have all that just yet. I need to stuggle more and learn more and grow more and I welcome every challange, because I become MORE with every obstacle I overcome. And when my day finally comes-I'll get to go home to my baby(Van) and our family. And i"d rather SHARE all our of good and bad fourtune, because the good would be a million percent less enjoyable if it was by myself and the bad would be intolerable without him.



i love you baby! you're my rock and i couldn't do any of this without you!