Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Hunger
Wow. It's been less than a month since I discovered the wonderful world of blogspot (and wordpress, and whatever, yadda). Since I discovered all the other stepmoms sharing their lives in this kind of public diary format.....I have devoured every post they've ever written no matter how many years they go back. At home, at work, in bed at night on my sk/lx reading....reading.....reading. Relating to the anger, dismay, and elation. Laughing at times and tearing up at others. I am so deeply invested now in the lives of the women whos blogs I follow. I have my favorties, some people are just more naturally talented at writing, their storytelling engages you more easily....but I love them all. I can't wait to find out what happens next....I devour their every word...and my hunger is still not satiated. Keep writing ladies. For me. And all the other women that laugh and cry with you.
Outrageous Injustice in Paternity Fraud Case
In the article below Tulsa World reporter Jarrel Wade details the way the Oklahoma child support system has ruined the life of Brande Samuels. I discussed the problem of men being "defaulted" into fatherhood in my co-authored column New American Bar Association Article Points to Crisis in False Paternity Judgments (Baltimore Sun, 8/20/06).
One interesting note--in a sidebar to the story, the paper reported that within a year "there were 3,127 paternity tests conducted in DHS cases. Of those, 781 of the alleged fathers were found not to be the genetic father." For those counting, that's a 25% false rate.
From Child support law leaves man a default dad (Tulsa World, 10/13/2008):
Convicted and incarcerated for possession of drugs in 2002, Brande Samuels made a deal.
He promised himself and his family that when he left his prison cell, he would work hard to build a stable and positive life.
After two years in prison, he was released early on good behavior and worked for less than minimum wage while he trained to become a welder.
But that's when he first got notice from the Oklahoma Department of Human Services' Child Support Enforcement Division that he owed child support, he said.
Now, Samuels owes about $13,000 in back child support, he lives with his ailing grandfather and DHS seizes portions of his wages every month.
"The last four years have been the worst in my life," Samuels said about life since leaving prison in 2004. "I went into so much debt."
Samuels said under other circumstances he would take full responsibility for the child as a father should.
But he is not the father.
Samuels was aware of the possibility that he might be the father during the pregnancy, he said. But the mother had been in another relationship at the same time.
"She wouldn't even allow me to sign the birth certificate," he said.
Two months later, the mother — Nadia Smith — put his name down as the father when she filed for child support, which Samuels wouldn't learn about until after his Oklahoma prison sentence, he said.
"They make (the mother) give up a name for the potential father. If she doesn't give up a name, then she can't get any assistance," Samuels said about the process to receive child support.
Jeff Wagner, spokesman for DHS, said when a mother is opening a child support case, she names the alleged father and provides "a great deal of information" in the Mother's Affidavit of Paternity.
In 2004, when Samuels left prison and learned of his obligation to DHS, case workers told Samuels if he wanted to fight the original order and get a hearing, he needed a lawyer, he said.
"I just want to be heard," he said. "The court was made for justice. It was made to help make the right decision."
Samuels did not have enough money to pay a lawyer, and no one would take his case for free, so in 2006, he approached Neighbor for Neighbor, a Tulsa nonprofit organization. They helped him prepare papers to require the mother to provide the child for a DNA test.
He found out then that the mother had left the state and had to be tracked down. She had left Oklahoma for Texas, Texas for Iowa, and then Iowa for Mississippi between 2004 and 2007, he said.
Neighbor for Neighbor helped Samuels track her through the courts and filed court papers seeking a DNA test from the child in March 2007, according to court records.
Two months later, Samuels received DNA evidence that the child support had been based on a false assumption. He was not the father — 0.00 percent chance.
"I was hurt. I was actually hurt because they put me through all this stuff without the child even being mine," he said.
After his three years of work, he believed he would be forgiven all his debt for the child, he said.
But it wasn't forgiven, and according to Oklahoma law, it won't be forgiven.
In child support cases, the burden of proof is on the alleged father — the accused — according to Oklahoma statutes.
An alleged father must appear at a child support hearing to request a paternity test. If he does not appear, he is legally designated as the father and child support is established in most cases.
Once designated as the father, that person is financially responsible for the child until he or she is 18 or adopted with a few stipulations for petitions which may vacate the original order, according to Oklahoma statutes.
DHS records show that Samuels was served papers to appear for his child support hearing in 2001, but Samuels said he was working in Texas at the time and could not have received the notice.
Wagner said by Oklahoma law someone can be legally served if the subpoena is put into the hands of someone 15 or older who lives at the same residence as the person.
But Samuels said the documents never touched his hands.
Regardless of the outcome of the DNA test, which Samuels spent three years trying to get, it was already too late.
Samuels was ruled the default father in 2001, and legally, DNA has no bearing.
"If you got me on default, you should still have to prove that I'm the father," he said.
This is the second recent story in the media of a default father being forced to pay child support in a bureaucratic nightmare with DHS.
The first, reported by The Oklahoman, was about Micheal Thomas of Tulsa, who had shown that he had never even met the mother and that he had DNA evidence that showed he wasn't the father. Still, he became a default father after missing his initial court hearing.
DHS does not keep statistics on the number of established fathers or default fathers who are not genetically related to the child they are responsible for, Wagner said.
In the eyes of the law and DHS, once paternity is established, there is no difference.
DHS officials would not comment on whether any changes have been made in establishing paternity since the Micheal Thomas case was reported.
I suggest readers thank reporter Jarrel Wade for reporting on the story by clicking here.
We previously covered the Michael Thomas story at CS Enforcement Erroneously Badgers College Athlete, He Forfeits Scholarship & Drops Out. Thanks to several readers for sending the story.
One interesting note--in a sidebar to the story, the paper reported that within a year "there were 3,127 paternity tests conducted in DHS cases. Of those, 781 of the alleged fathers were found not to be the genetic father." For those counting, that's a 25% false rate.
From Child support law leaves man a default dad (Tulsa World, 10/13/2008):
Convicted and incarcerated for possession of drugs in 2002, Brande Samuels made a deal.
He promised himself and his family that when he left his prison cell, he would work hard to build a stable and positive life.
After two years in prison, he was released early on good behavior and worked for less than minimum wage while he trained to become a welder.
But that's when he first got notice from the Oklahoma Department of Human Services' Child Support Enforcement Division that he owed child support, he said.
Now, Samuels owes about $13,000 in back child support, he lives with his ailing grandfather and DHS seizes portions of his wages every month.
"The last four years have been the worst in my life," Samuels said about life since leaving prison in 2004. "I went into so much debt."
Samuels said under other circumstances he would take full responsibility for the child as a father should.
But he is not the father.
Samuels was aware of the possibility that he might be the father during the pregnancy, he said. But the mother had been in another relationship at the same time.
"She wouldn't even allow me to sign the birth certificate," he said.
Two months later, the mother — Nadia Smith — put his name down as the father when she filed for child support, which Samuels wouldn't learn about until after his Oklahoma prison sentence, he said.
"They make (the mother) give up a name for the potential father. If she doesn't give up a name, then she can't get any assistance," Samuels said about the process to receive child support.
Jeff Wagner, spokesman for DHS, said when a mother is opening a child support case, she names the alleged father and provides "a great deal of information" in the Mother's Affidavit of Paternity.
In 2004, when Samuels left prison and learned of his obligation to DHS, case workers told Samuels if he wanted to fight the original order and get a hearing, he needed a lawyer, he said.
"I just want to be heard," he said. "The court was made for justice. It was made to help make the right decision."
Samuels did not have enough money to pay a lawyer, and no one would take his case for free, so in 2006, he approached Neighbor for Neighbor, a Tulsa nonprofit organization. They helped him prepare papers to require the mother to provide the child for a DNA test.
He found out then that the mother had left the state and had to be tracked down. She had left Oklahoma for Texas, Texas for Iowa, and then Iowa for Mississippi between 2004 and 2007, he said.
Neighbor for Neighbor helped Samuels track her through the courts and filed court papers seeking a DNA test from the child in March 2007, according to court records.
Two months later, Samuels received DNA evidence that the child support had been based on a false assumption. He was not the father — 0.00 percent chance.
"I was hurt. I was actually hurt because they put me through all this stuff without the child even being mine," he said.
After his three years of work, he believed he would be forgiven all his debt for the child, he said.
But it wasn't forgiven, and according to Oklahoma law, it won't be forgiven.
In child support cases, the burden of proof is on the alleged father — the accused — according to Oklahoma statutes.
An alleged father must appear at a child support hearing to request a paternity test. If he does not appear, he is legally designated as the father and child support is established in most cases.
Once designated as the father, that person is financially responsible for the child until he or she is 18 or adopted with a few stipulations for petitions which may vacate the original order, according to Oklahoma statutes.
DHS records show that Samuels was served papers to appear for his child support hearing in 2001, but Samuels said he was working in Texas at the time and could not have received the notice.
Wagner said by Oklahoma law someone can be legally served if the subpoena is put into the hands of someone 15 or older who lives at the same residence as the person.
But Samuels said the documents never touched his hands.
Regardless of the outcome of the DNA test, which Samuels spent three years trying to get, it was already too late.
Samuels was ruled the default father in 2001, and legally, DNA has no bearing.
"If you got me on default, you should still have to prove that I'm the father," he said.
This is the second recent story in the media of a default father being forced to pay child support in a bureaucratic nightmare with DHS.
The first, reported by The Oklahoman, was about Micheal Thomas of Tulsa, who had shown that he had never even met the mother and that he had DNA evidence that showed he wasn't the father. Still, he became a default father after missing his initial court hearing.
DHS does not keep statistics on the number of established fathers or default fathers who are not genetically related to the child they are responsible for, Wagner said.
In the eyes of the law and DHS, once paternity is established, there is no difference.
DHS officials would not comment on whether any changes have been made in establishing paternity since the Micheal Thomas case was reported.
I suggest readers thank reporter Jarrel Wade for reporting on the story by clicking here.
We previously covered the Michael Thomas story at CS Enforcement Erroneously Badgers College Athlete, He Forfeits Scholarship & Drops Out. Thanks to several readers for sending the story.
Monday, September 29, 2008
And MY step brats say they hate me when I take their cell phones......
“Wicked Stepmother” Given a Sorry Sentence
What’s the going rate these days for forcing your stepkids to gorge, and then digest their own puke? Two to six years, according to the state of West Virginia. Venus Critchfield was sentenced today for abuse that occurred in 2001 and 2002, but that allegedly dates back to 1997. Critchfield’s husband, Jennings Brian Critchfield, is already serving up to 15 years on abuse charges. Besides the vomit allegations, Critchfield was also cited for beating her stepchildren’s feet with boards and dangling them from ropes and hooks.
Is it just me, or does this sentence seem rather light for such abominable treatment? Given the way Judge Alan D. Moats verbally tore her apart, I’m sure he was just sentencing within the guidelines. But, still. This woman shouldn’t see the light of day for at least five years. Minimum.
*************************************************************************************
Stepmother Admits Sending Hate Email to Stepdaughter
“You’re disgusting, everybody at school hates you.” Sounds like the typical ugliness you’d read in a note written by a middle-schooler, or on Bill O’Reilly’s Web site, huh? But no! The Jerusalem 10-year-old who received such messages has her own newly-minted stepmother to thank for this vitriol. Stepmommy Dearest also admitted to trying to slip a physical note to her new daughter through another girl at school; the girl, apparently realizing that the mother was a few tire skids short of Susan Smith, refused.
Any bets on how long this marriage will last?
*************************************************************************************
Dad and Stepmother Charged with Beating Child to within Inches of Life
A hot tipper sent along a story about two parents who make Brandon Alan Austill, the dad who cattle-prodded his own baby, look like a canonized saint. Terry and Chandy Indula’s 3-year-old daughter is close to death after being tortured by the dad and stepmom for months on end. Authorities in Modesto, California say that there wasn’t an inch of the girl not covered in blisters, and that her body temp when they found her was 79 degrees. The last official word is that the girl may survive, but with permanent brain damage.
The Indulas - he a real estate broker, she a stay-at-home abuser er, “mother” - have admitted to the abuse. Their other kids have been taken into state custody; some of them show signs of abuse as well.
It’s sickening to think that people like this can be living in your neighborhood, yet neither you nor anyone else ever catch on that behind those four walls lies a torture pit. Such so-called parents spend more time hiding their crimes from the community than caring for their kids. Look at that cold, dead look in Chandy Indula’s eyes. Did these people ever care for their kids? Were they halfway-decent parents who, one day, just snapped? Doubt it. There was undoubtedly some bizarre strain of “abuser attraction” that brought these two together. They better pray that their little girl lives. Not for her sake, of course; these creatures are probably incapable of such selfless emotion. No, they better pray for some medical miracles if they don’t want their asses to have a date with California’s electric chair.
************************************************************************************
What’s the going rate these days for forcing your stepkids to gorge, and then digest their own puke? Two to six years, according to the state of West Virginia. Venus Critchfield was sentenced today for abuse that occurred in 2001 and 2002, but that allegedly dates back to 1997. Critchfield’s husband, Jennings Brian Critchfield, is already serving up to 15 years on abuse charges. Besides the vomit allegations, Critchfield was also cited for beating her stepchildren’s feet with boards and dangling them from ropes and hooks.
Is it just me, or does this sentence seem rather light for such abominable treatment? Given the way Judge Alan D. Moats verbally tore her apart, I’m sure he was just sentencing within the guidelines. But, still. This woman shouldn’t see the light of day for at least five years. Minimum.
*************************************************************************************
Stepmother Admits Sending Hate Email to Stepdaughter
“You’re disgusting, everybody at school hates you.” Sounds like the typical ugliness you’d read in a note written by a middle-schooler, or on Bill O’Reilly’s Web site, huh? But no! The Jerusalem 10-year-old who received such messages has her own newly-minted stepmother to thank for this vitriol. Stepmommy Dearest also admitted to trying to slip a physical note to her new daughter through another girl at school; the girl, apparently realizing that the mother was a few tire skids short of Susan Smith, refused.
Any bets on how long this marriage will last?
*************************************************************************************
Dad and Stepmother Charged with Beating Child to within Inches of Life
A hot tipper sent along a story about two parents who make Brandon Alan Austill, the dad who cattle-prodded his own baby, look like a canonized saint. Terry and Chandy Indula’s 3-year-old daughter is close to death after being tortured by the dad and stepmom for months on end. Authorities in Modesto, California say that there wasn’t an inch of the girl not covered in blisters, and that her body temp when they found her was 79 degrees. The last official word is that the girl may survive, but with permanent brain damage.
The Indulas - he a real estate broker, she a stay-at-home abuser er, “mother” - have admitted to the abuse. Their other kids have been taken into state custody; some of them show signs of abuse as well.
It’s sickening to think that people like this can be living in your neighborhood, yet neither you nor anyone else ever catch on that behind those four walls lies a torture pit. Such so-called parents spend more time hiding their crimes from the community than caring for their kids. Look at that cold, dead look in Chandy Indula’s eyes. Did these people ever care for their kids? Were they halfway-decent parents who, one day, just snapped? Doubt it. There was undoubtedly some bizarre strain of “abuser attraction” that brought these two together. They better pray that their little girl lives. Not for her sake, of course; these creatures are probably incapable of such selfless emotion. No, they better pray for some medical miracles if they don’t want their asses to have a date with California’s electric chair.
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Monday, August 18, 2008
remember a couple months back
When I mentioned illinois had formed a committe to review the current child support laws? We'll I'mma break it down a little more. I'LL Is one of the only states that still has a stauatory percentage system for child support. They take your gross income and calculate your payment by a percentage based off the number of children. In CONTRAST most states with modern child support laws factor in the income of BOTH parents. So if the parents paying child support makes 20k a year and the person receiving child support makes 60k a year-thats taken into consideration. Also-subsequent children are taken into consideration. Right now my kids needs don't matter to child support because "first family comes first". Also time spent with each parent is factored and anything over 92 overnights with either parent is "shared physical custody". I think the system is going to be much better and much more fair. I'm excited. I'LL is using colorados statues as a base and under colorado law our c/s would go from well over 500 a month to 200. YAY.
Monday, August 11, 2008
odd
Trin has suddenly dropped "mommy" and started calling me "mom". Strange.....none of the other children call me "mom"
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
shit!!!!!!!
M+}h..{:_c"..{2
I still don't have power. I had to drive 30 minutes outta my way last night cuz every viaduct from kedzie to damen was flooded. There was no going further north than fulton. Trying to go east was a damn ordeal too.... the viaducts parallel to western were flooded too. I watched people more impatient than myself try and drive through the water.....only to become stuck with water up to their windshields. And have to climb out of their windows to escape the murky mess. People tried clearing the water by driving down the sidewalks only to hopelessly damadge their cars when the clearance became too narrow. Not to mention it was still raining. And pitch black because there was no power. I finally made it past both viaducts only to come to an entire street that was terribly flooded. Evntually, I made it home...to find my street, and the alleys blocked with fallen trees and debris. I parked where I could and walked the rest of the way. There were FOUR huge trees on my street alone. Peoples cars were trashed. A lightpole on my street was literally broken in two. My power has been off all night. I get no cell signal inside my house. The trees on my street are still down.........wtf!
I still don't have power. I had to drive 30 minutes outta my way last night cuz every viaduct from kedzie to damen was flooded. There was no going further north than fulton. Trying to go east was a damn ordeal too.... the viaducts parallel to western were flooded too. I watched people more impatient than myself try and drive through the water.....only to become stuck with water up to their windshields. And have to climb out of their windows to escape the murky mess. People tried clearing the water by driving down the sidewalks only to hopelessly damadge their cars when the clearance became too narrow. Not to mention it was still raining. And pitch black because there was no power. I finally made it past both viaducts only to come to an entire street that was terribly flooded. Evntually, I made it home...to find my street, and the alleys blocked with fallen trees and debris. I parked where I could and walked the rest of the way. There were FOUR huge trees on my street alone. Peoples cars were trashed. A lightpole on my street was literally broken in two. My power has been off all night. I get no cell signal inside my house. The trees on my street are still down.........wtf!
Friday, August 1, 2008
the cruelty just doesn’t ever end
Starved, disabled girl was failed at every turn
By KATHY MATHESON, Associated Press Writer Fri Aug 1, 9:27 PM ET
PHILADELPHIA - For days before Danieal Kelly died in a fetid, airless room — made stifling hot by a midsummer heat wave — the bedridden teenager begged for something to drink until she could muster only one word: water.
Unable to help herself because of her cerebral palsy, she wasted away from malnutrition and maggot-infested bedsores that ate her flesh. She died alone on a putrid mattress in her mother's home, the floor covered in feces. She was 14 but weighed just 42 pounds.
The nightmare of forced starvation and infection that killed Danieal while she was under the protection of the city's human services agency is documented in a 258-page grand jury report released this week that charges nine people — her parents, four social workers and three family friends — in her ghastly death.
The report describes a mother, Andrea Kelly, who was embarrassed by her disabled daughter and didn't want to touch her, take her out in public, change her diapers or make sure she had enough fluids. It portrays Daniel Kelly, the father who once had custody of Danieal, as having no interest in raising her.
And it accuses the city Department of Human Services of being "uncaring and incompetent."
"It was this indifference that helped kill Danieal Kelly," an angry District Attorney Lynne Abraham said. "How is it possible for this to have happened?"
The report should "outrage the entire Philadelphia community" and bring about "earth-shattering, cataclysmic changes" at the Department of Human Services, Abraham said.
Andrea Kelly, 39, the only defendant charged with murder, was ordered held Friday without bail. The social workers — suspected of falsifying home visits and progress reports in the case — face charges ranging from child endangerment to involuntary manslaughter. The family friends are accused of lying to the grand jury about the girl's condition before her death.
None of the lawyers for any of the defendants had any immediate comment.
Human Services Commissioner Anne Marie Ambrose, in office only a month, said Thursday that she is intent on improving child safety and worker accountability in an agency that has repeatedly been accused of failing to protect children.
Late Friday, the city announced the resignation of Assistant Health Commissioner Carmen Paris. The grand jury had accused Paris of interfering in the investigation of the girl's death while she was acting health commissioner, but found insufficient evidence to charge her with obstruction of justice.
The report on Danieal's death in August 2006 documents a downward spiral from the early years that she spent in Arizona with her father and his girlfriend.
Though Danieal attended special-needs classes only sporadically, a school report described her as an active learner and "one of the sweetest students ever enrolled in this program." But allegations of parental neglect soon surfaced, and following Daniel Kelly's breakup with his girlfriend in 2001, Danieal never again attended school...
Daniel Kelly and his children moved to Philadelphia in 2003. He eventually asked his estranged wife to move in, even though she had several other children and he knew she was incapable of caring for Danieal, authorities say. He then moved out.
"Daniel Kelly was well aware what deserting his daughter meant to her safety and welfare," the grand jury report said. "He just did not care."
The Department of Human Services received at least five reports of Danieal being mistreated between 2003 and 2005. All described a "helpless child sitting unattended, unkempt and unwashed, in a small stroller in her own urine and feces," her screams ignored by her mother, the grand jury report said. The stroller, which served as a wheelchair, apparently never left the house.
Agency employee Dana Poindexter, assigned to investigate, also ignored Danieal, authorities say. Already having been suspended after a 3-week-old baby died on his watch in 2002, Poindexter continued his "slovenly, neglectful and dangerously reckless work habits" after being assigned the Kelly case, the grand jury said. He did not file a single report, authorities said.
The Kellys finally were assigned help from a private agency in 2005. Employee Julius Murray was required to visit the family twice a week, but authorities believe he may have come to the house only once — to have Andrea Kelly sign predated forms attesting to future visits.
The grand jury report said Laura Sommerer, a city social worker, failed to hold the now-defunct company accountable when, months later, Danieal still was not enrolled in school or receiving medical care.
And after Danieal died, authorities say, company director Mickal Kamuvaka held a "forgery fest" in her office where she had employees "concoct almost a year's worth of false progress reports."
But authorities say Andrea Kelly, whose other children are now in foster care, is primarily responsible for her daughter's death.
The report said she was confronted repeatedly by her own mother, uncle, friends and even two of her sons about Danieal's deteriorating health. She would lie or put them off by saying she would seek help, or banish them from the house, authorities say.
In the meantime, the report said, she entertained friends, attended classes and fed her other children.
"This behavior indicates that Andrea Kelly did not merely allow Danieal to die," the report said. "She may have even wanted her disabled daughter to die."
When an ambulance responded to a 911 call for Danieal on Aug. 4, 2006, the girl had been dead for several hours. Authorities said she was so emaciated she looked like the victim of a concentration camp.
She had been lying on the filthy mattress for so long that her body outline was imprinted on it.
By KATHY MATHESON, Associated Press Writer Fri Aug 1, 9:27 PM ET
PHILADELPHIA - For days before Danieal Kelly died in a fetid, airless room — made stifling hot by a midsummer heat wave — the bedridden teenager begged for something to drink until she could muster only one word: water.
Unable to help herself because of her cerebral palsy, she wasted away from malnutrition and maggot-infested bedsores that ate her flesh. She died alone on a putrid mattress in her mother's home, the floor covered in feces. She was 14 but weighed just 42 pounds.
The nightmare of forced starvation and infection that killed Danieal while she was under the protection of the city's human services agency is documented in a 258-page grand jury report released this week that charges nine people — her parents, four social workers and three family friends — in her ghastly death.
The report describes a mother, Andrea Kelly, who was embarrassed by her disabled daughter and didn't want to touch her, take her out in public, change her diapers or make sure she had enough fluids. It portrays Daniel Kelly, the father who once had custody of Danieal, as having no interest in raising her.
And it accuses the city Department of Human Services of being "uncaring and incompetent."
"It was this indifference that helped kill Danieal Kelly," an angry District Attorney Lynne Abraham said. "How is it possible for this to have happened?"
The report should "outrage the entire Philadelphia community" and bring about "earth-shattering, cataclysmic changes" at the Department of Human Services, Abraham said.
Andrea Kelly, 39, the only defendant charged with murder, was ordered held Friday without bail. The social workers — suspected of falsifying home visits and progress reports in the case — face charges ranging from child endangerment to involuntary manslaughter. The family friends are accused of lying to the grand jury about the girl's condition before her death.
None of the lawyers for any of the defendants had any immediate comment.
Human Services Commissioner Anne Marie Ambrose, in office only a month, said Thursday that she is intent on improving child safety and worker accountability in an agency that has repeatedly been accused of failing to protect children.
Late Friday, the city announced the resignation of Assistant Health Commissioner Carmen Paris. The grand jury had accused Paris of interfering in the investigation of the girl's death while she was acting health commissioner, but found insufficient evidence to charge her with obstruction of justice.
The report on Danieal's death in August 2006 documents a downward spiral from the early years that she spent in Arizona with her father and his girlfriend.
Though Danieal attended special-needs classes only sporadically, a school report described her as an active learner and "one of the sweetest students ever enrolled in this program." But allegations of parental neglect soon surfaced, and following Daniel Kelly's breakup with his girlfriend in 2001, Danieal never again attended school...
Daniel Kelly and his children moved to Philadelphia in 2003. He eventually asked his estranged wife to move in, even though she had several other children and he knew she was incapable of caring for Danieal, authorities say. He then moved out.
"Daniel Kelly was well aware what deserting his daughter meant to her safety and welfare," the grand jury report said. "He just did not care."
The Department of Human Services received at least five reports of Danieal being mistreated between 2003 and 2005. All described a "helpless child sitting unattended, unkempt and unwashed, in a small stroller in her own urine and feces," her screams ignored by her mother, the grand jury report said. The stroller, which served as a wheelchair, apparently never left the house.
Agency employee Dana Poindexter, assigned to investigate, also ignored Danieal, authorities say. Already having been suspended after a 3-week-old baby died on his watch in 2002, Poindexter continued his "slovenly, neglectful and dangerously reckless work habits" after being assigned the Kelly case, the grand jury said. He did not file a single report, authorities said.
The Kellys finally were assigned help from a private agency in 2005. Employee Julius Murray was required to visit the family twice a week, but authorities believe he may have come to the house only once — to have Andrea Kelly sign predated forms attesting to future visits.
The grand jury report said Laura Sommerer, a city social worker, failed to hold the now-defunct company accountable when, months later, Danieal still was not enrolled in school or receiving medical care.
And after Danieal died, authorities say, company director Mickal Kamuvaka held a "forgery fest" in her office where she had employees "concoct almost a year's worth of false progress reports."
But authorities say Andrea Kelly, whose other children are now in foster care, is primarily responsible for her daughter's death.
The report said she was confronted repeatedly by her own mother, uncle, friends and even two of her sons about Danieal's deteriorating health. She would lie or put them off by saying she would seek help, or banish them from the house, authorities say.
In the meantime, the report said, she entertained friends, attended classes and fed her other children.
"This behavior indicates that Andrea Kelly did not merely allow Danieal to die," the report said. "She may have even wanted her disabled daughter to die."
When an ambulance responded to a 911 call for Danieal on Aug. 4, 2006, the girl had been dead for several hours. Authorities said she was so emaciated she looked like the victim of a concentration camp.
She had been lying on the filthy mattress for so long that her body outline was imprinted on it.
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Thursday, July 24, 2008
i don’t watch you...but thank you abc channel 7 news,,,,,
(WLS) -- It is a story of fractured families, empty bank accounts and missing money.
When the I-Team received an email from Army Sergeant Joshua Hinkle a few weeks ago, it first caught our attention because it was sent from Camp Bucca in Iraq.
The soldier wrote that he was suffering a great injustice: the state of Illinois, he claimed, had cleaned out his entire bank account for child support.
"They went into my bank account and they took it, they took it down to the penny," said Hinkle, who's with the Illinois National Guard.
The I-Team spoke with Sergeant Hinkle by a webcam link-up, after he had provided bank records and military pay stubs that seemed to back up his serious allegations.
"The state of Illinois child collection support, child collection agency basically stole $4,000 from me without any notification or anything for child support they say I owe and I disagree with," Hinkle said.
As you might imagine, the situation is slightly more complex. Hinkle, of the Quad Cities, has been stationed in Basra province for the past seven months. It is his second Iraq tour. Hinkle was first there as a regular army officer when the war began. He has a son, 10-year-old Cody.
"I had a child very young; we were still in high school. And, uh, once I joined active duty, we set up the child support payment system and we've had problems with them ever since," Hinkle said.
And he has a 2-year-old daughter, Scarlett. His children have different mothers.
Hinkle says, and the state agrees, that he kept up with all required child support payments except for a period between assignments in Iraq, when he struggled with employment.
Since being back on the military's payroll as a reservist, full child support, including installments for the missed payments, have been withdrawn from his Army paychecks until June, when the state put a lien on his bank account and took it all.
"I don't know how it is legal. Even if I was at home, how is it legal to take 100 percent of my income?" Hinkle said.
It is legal for the state to take whatever money he makes until it's all paid.
An email sent to Hinkle in Iraq from the Illinois Division of Child Support says, "We show the past due debt to be $15,291.78, which is a total due for two separate child support cases."
Even though what Hinkle owes in back pay qualifies him for the public list of deadbeat dads, his picture isn't on it. But as the state Web site promises, the child support division will use all available enforcement tools to collect, regardless of whether a person is serving in Iraq.
"In the case of, certainly, this soldier, it sounds like they're not acting in the best interests of the child by financially trying to destroy one of the parents," said Mark Schario, American Coalition for Fathers and Children.
Child support experts say Hinkle and other GIs stationed overseas have no recourse, nor are they protected by laws intended to make sure soldiers do not lose jobs and other benefits while serving.
"I've contacted them on numerous occasions," Hinkle said. "I've emailed them. They emailed me once. Every time I call I'm on hold for approximately 20 to 40 minutes and over here, that is a long time because we have to use phone cards."
"That soldier is serving in Iraq and can't be back here to represent himself that's not by his choice, he's serving his country," Schario said.
"It has definitely made life stressful over here," Hinkle said. "I hate checking my bank account. I hate checking my email. We work 12 hours a day, six days a week. And it has, it's made life really unbearable over here."
The state initially sent a generic statement praising those in the military but noting the importance of paying child support:
"The Department of Healthcare and Family Services has the utmost respect and admiration for those who protect and defend our nation overseas. Illinois state law gives the Department the authority to help parents receive the child support they deserve, and the law provides multiple avenues to help us do that. While we are cognizant of the concerns some may have when forced to pay child support, it is important to remember that the money is going to support their children."
On Wednesday in Iraq, Sergeant Hinkle received an e-mail from the state informing him he now owes more than $18,000 in back payments and that if he disagrees, he should send them evidence from Iraq.
Most puzzling is what happened to all that money the state seized from his account in June. The boy's mother said she hasn't seen any of it.
SERVICEMEMBERS CIVIL RELIEF ACT
http://www.usdoj.gov/crt/military/scratext.htm
ILLINOIS CHILD SUPPORT
http://www.ilchildsupport.com
AMERICAN COALITION FOR FATHERS AND CHILDREN
http://www.acfc.org/site/PageServer
************************************************************
(WLS) -- The director of the Illinois child support system says that parents serving in the military are treated fairly in the collection of child support and with the best interest of children in mind.
Pam Lowry, Administrator of the Division of Child Support Enforcement for the Illinois Department of Healthcare and Family Services contacted the I-Team after our report: "Fighting For His Country; Fighting Against Illinois."
After declining to be interviewed or provide any details for the Wednesday evening TV report, Ms. Lowry and the department's communications director Annie Thompson said they received permission from the parents who were featured in our child support story to speak with us.
Lowry and Thompson both dispute the statement by Army Sgt. Joshua Hinkle that "The state of Illinois child support collection agency basically stole $4,000 from me without any notification or anything for child support they say I owe and I disagree with&I don't know how it is legal. Even if I was at home, how is it legal to take 100 percent of my income?"
They admit however that Child Support officials did not know Sgt. Hinkle was stationed in a war zone when they slapped a lien on his bank account for monies past due.
"We try to help people overseas with their situation," Thompson told the I-team. "We work to accommodate military people."
Ms. Lowry provided the I-Team with a detailed chronology of the Hinkle dispute over past due child support for his two children.
Lowry said that on Sept. 28, 2007 the department gave notice to Hinkle of his outstanding child support balance and informed him of his right to challenge the notification. "He didn't protest," Lowry stated.
On June 9, 2008 the department sent notice of lien to his bank and to Hinkle, Lowry said, which included a provision that the money would be frozen for 180 days or until the issue was resolved whichever came first. "Hinkle was given time to react and didn't," she said.
On June 19 the department received a reply from the bank stating that Hinkle's account balance of $4268.59 was frozen.
On June 24 a department case worker spoke to Hinkle, who was serving in Iraq. "He was aware of the lien," said Administrator Lowry, who noted that the child support division received subsequent emails from Hinkle and his JAG attorney.
Illinois Child Support officials say they did not know until that conversation on June 24 that Hinkle was in Iraq.
On June 27 the department told Hinkle why a lien was being used and gave him his balance owed. The state offered to lien $2268 of account balance and leave $2000 alone in Hinkle's account.
On July 3 Lowry said the state received an email from Hinkle stating he didn't agree with the proposal and wanted to take issue to court. She said that he had a right to do so, but that would not stop the lien from being executed.
On July 21 the state agency told Hinkle's bank to remit $2268 to the Department of Healthcare and Family Services for child support arrears. They sent that amount to us and left $2000 in Hinkle's account.
The bank, this morning, said they will send $2268 to HFS and we will send it to family tomorrow.
"We didn't take all the money," Lowry told the I-Team. "We try to be fair to both parents&when people owe significant amounts of child support we look at bank accounts that have a balance and we notify them that we will lien that account. When they contact us we try to learn particulars of the case."
Firmly, Ms. Lowry said that they follow all federal and state laws and that "We know there are opportunities for soldiers to work with us. We were able to communicate with Hinkle. We try to help people overcome barriers."
When the I-Team received an email from Army Sergeant Joshua Hinkle a few weeks ago, it first caught our attention because it was sent from Camp Bucca in Iraq.
The soldier wrote that he was suffering a great injustice: the state of Illinois, he claimed, had cleaned out his entire bank account for child support.
"They went into my bank account and they took it, they took it down to the penny," said Hinkle, who's with the Illinois National Guard.
The I-Team spoke with Sergeant Hinkle by a webcam link-up, after he had provided bank records and military pay stubs that seemed to back up his serious allegations.
"The state of Illinois child collection support, child collection agency basically stole $4,000 from me without any notification or anything for child support they say I owe and I disagree with," Hinkle said.
As you might imagine, the situation is slightly more complex. Hinkle, of the Quad Cities, has been stationed in Basra province for the past seven months. It is his second Iraq tour. Hinkle was first there as a regular army officer when the war began. He has a son, 10-year-old Cody.
"I had a child very young; we were still in high school. And, uh, once I joined active duty, we set up the child support payment system and we've had problems with them ever since," Hinkle said.
And he has a 2-year-old daughter, Scarlett. His children have different mothers.
Hinkle says, and the state agrees, that he kept up with all required child support payments except for a period between assignments in Iraq, when he struggled with employment.
Since being back on the military's payroll as a reservist, full child support, including installments for the missed payments, have been withdrawn from his Army paychecks until June, when the state put a lien on his bank account and took it all.
"I don't know how it is legal. Even if I was at home, how is it legal to take 100 percent of my income?" Hinkle said.
It is legal for the state to take whatever money he makes until it's all paid.
An email sent to Hinkle in Iraq from the Illinois Division of Child Support says, "We show the past due debt to be $15,291.78, which is a total due for two separate child support cases."
Even though what Hinkle owes in back pay qualifies him for the public list of deadbeat dads, his picture isn't on it. But as the state Web site promises, the child support division will use all available enforcement tools to collect, regardless of whether a person is serving in Iraq.
"In the case of, certainly, this soldier, it sounds like they're not acting in the best interests of the child by financially trying to destroy one of the parents," said Mark Schario, American Coalition for Fathers and Children.
Child support experts say Hinkle and other GIs stationed overseas have no recourse, nor are they protected by laws intended to make sure soldiers do not lose jobs and other benefits while serving.
"I've contacted them on numerous occasions," Hinkle said. "I've emailed them. They emailed me once. Every time I call I'm on hold for approximately 20 to 40 minutes and over here, that is a long time because we have to use phone cards."
"That soldier is serving in Iraq and can't be back here to represent himself that's not by his choice, he's serving his country," Schario said.
"It has definitely made life stressful over here," Hinkle said. "I hate checking my bank account. I hate checking my email. We work 12 hours a day, six days a week. And it has, it's made life really unbearable over here."
The state initially sent a generic statement praising those in the military but noting the importance of paying child support:
"The Department of Healthcare and Family Services has the utmost respect and admiration for those who protect and defend our nation overseas. Illinois state law gives the Department the authority to help parents receive the child support they deserve, and the law provides multiple avenues to help us do that. While we are cognizant of the concerns some may have when forced to pay child support, it is important to remember that the money is going to support their children."
On Wednesday in Iraq, Sergeant Hinkle received an e-mail from the state informing him he now owes more than $18,000 in back payments and that if he disagrees, he should send them evidence from Iraq.
Most puzzling is what happened to all that money the state seized from his account in June. The boy's mother said she hasn't seen any of it.
SERVICEMEMBERS CIVIL RELIEF ACT
http://www.usdoj.gov/crt/military/scratext.htm
ILLINOIS CHILD SUPPORT
http://www.ilchildsupport.com
AMERICAN COALITION FOR FATHERS AND CHILDREN
http://www.acfc.org/site/PageServer
************************************************************
(WLS) -- The director of the Illinois child support system says that parents serving in the military are treated fairly in the collection of child support and with the best interest of children in mind.
Pam Lowry, Administrator of the Division of Child Support Enforcement for the Illinois Department of Healthcare and Family Services contacted the I-Team after our report: "Fighting For His Country; Fighting Against Illinois."
After declining to be interviewed or provide any details for the Wednesday evening TV report, Ms. Lowry and the department's communications director Annie Thompson said they received permission from the parents who were featured in our child support story to speak with us.
Lowry and Thompson both dispute the statement by Army Sgt. Joshua Hinkle that "The state of Illinois child support collection agency basically stole $4,000 from me without any notification or anything for child support they say I owe and I disagree with&I don't know how it is legal. Even if I was at home, how is it legal to take 100 percent of my income?"
They admit however that Child Support officials did not know Sgt. Hinkle was stationed in a war zone when they slapped a lien on his bank account for monies past due.
"We try to help people overseas with their situation," Thompson told the I-team. "We work to accommodate military people."
Ms. Lowry provided the I-Team with a detailed chronology of the Hinkle dispute over past due child support for his two children.
Lowry said that on Sept. 28, 2007 the department gave notice to Hinkle of his outstanding child support balance and informed him of his right to challenge the notification. "He didn't protest," Lowry stated.
On June 9, 2008 the department sent notice of lien to his bank and to Hinkle, Lowry said, which included a provision that the money would be frozen for 180 days or until the issue was resolved whichever came first. "Hinkle was given time to react and didn't," she said.
On June 19 the department received a reply from the bank stating that Hinkle's account balance of $4268.59 was frozen.
On June 24 a department case worker spoke to Hinkle, who was serving in Iraq. "He was aware of the lien," said Administrator Lowry, who noted that the child support division received subsequent emails from Hinkle and his JAG attorney.
Illinois Child Support officials say they did not know until that conversation on June 24 that Hinkle was in Iraq.
On June 27 the department told Hinkle why a lien was being used and gave him his balance owed. The state offered to lien $2268 of account balance and leave $2000 alone in Hinkle's account.
On July 3 Lowry said the state received an email from Hinkle stating he didn't agree with the proposal and wanted to take issue to court. She said that he had a right to do so, but that would not stop the lien from being executed.
On July 21 the state agency told Hinkle's bank to remit $2268 to the Department of Healthcare and Family Services for child support arrears. They sent that amount to us and left $2000 in Hinkle's account.
The bank, this morning, said they will send $2268 to HFS and we will send it to family tomorrow.
"We didn't take all the money," Lowry told the I-Team. "We try to be fair to both parents&when people owe significant amounts of child support we look at bank accounts that have a balance and we notify them that we will lien that account. When they contact us we try to learn particulars of the case."
Firmly, Ms. Lowry said that they follow all federal and state laws and that "We know there are opportunities for soldiers to work with us. We were able to communicate with Hinkle. We try to help people overcome barriers."
Friday, July 11, 2008
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
you may have had your fill yesterday...but this has to be noted
DA: Mom kept cancer medication from 8-year-old son
By Julie Manganis
Staff writer
SALEM — A mother has been charged with failing to give her 8-year-old son his cancer medication, a decision prosecutors say caused the boy's cancer to return in an untreatable form.
Because of Kristen Anne LaBrie's failure to medicate her child, "in all likelihood, Jeremy Fraser will not see his ninth birthday," prosecutor Kate MacDougall said during LaBrie's arraignment yesterday in Salem District Court.
LaBrie, 36, who moved recently from Salem to Beverly, pleaded not guilty to reckless child endangerment. She refused comment as she left court with her lawyer.
The boy's father, Eric Fraser, who now has full custody of his son, said he is outraged not only about what happened to his son, but that LaBrie was able to walk out of court yesterday without posting any bail.
"I'm pretty disgusted about the whole justice (system) and DSS," Fraser said. "Now my son's going to die."
Jeremy, 8, who is also autistic, had been in remission from non-Hodgkin's lymphoma, but in March the Department of Social Services was contacted by the child's oncologist at Massachusetts General Hospital.
Dr. Alison Friedmann filed a report of suspected neglect with the state after discovering that the child's cancer had returned, something that should not have happened had the child been given his medications.
"It's back and in a far more deadly form," MacDougall told Judge Michael Uhlarik. "He is not expected to survive."
Jeremy's ninth birthday is Aug. 2.
When first diagnosed, Jeremy had a good prognosis, according to a police report, with his chances of recovery put at 85 to 90 percent. But after being deprived of medications, his chances dropped to 10 percent.
"This child was in remission," MacDougall said. "His prognosis was good. This child came out of remission."
But the prosecutor said LaBrie did not fill at least half of the prescriptions her son was given — something the doctor and investigators checked by examining pharmacy and insurance records. She also canceled a number of her son's medical appointments, MacDougall said.
Canceled appointments
According to the police report by Salem detectives Peter Baglioni and Lt. Thomas Griffin, Jeremy was first diagnosed with non-Hodgkin's lymphoma in 2006. The child underwent a five-phase regimen of chemotherapy, including some drugs that were supposed to be given to him at home by his mother.
The detectives said LaBrie had canceled at least a dozen appointments for chemotherapy treatments and had failed to pick up the medications from a pharmacy.
"Due to Ms. LaBrie's failure to provide Jeremy with lifesaving cancer medication, his cancer has returned," the detectives wrote.
Fraser said his ex-wife picked up Jeremy's medication for about a month after he came home from the hospital. Then she just stopped.
Because of ongoing disputes with his ex-wife and her boyfriend, Fraser said, he cut off contact with her and with his son for some months. Then he got a call from LaBrie's sister, who told him Jeremy was back in the hospital and things didn't look good.
Fraser, a full-time UPS delivery driver, was on the road delivering packages a few weeks later when his son's doctor called.
"The doctor said, 'You need to pull over,'" Fraser said.
The doctors and a DSS worker "said Kristen basically stopped giving him his medicine," Fraser said. "She missed four IV chemo appointments and rescheduled 13 of them."
"It comes out to about a year that she didn't continue with the treatment," Fraser said. "They basically said if Jeremy got his at-home chemo he would not have relapsed. The doctor was very shocked that he was back in there so quickly."
Then the doctor told him they couldn't let Jeremy go home with LaBrie. "It's either you or foster care," Fraser recalled being told. The choice was clear.
'A peach' of a kid
Fraser and his son now live with Fraser's father in Saugus. Jeremy still spends part of his day in a special education program, and the rest of Fraser's family helps care for the boy while Fraser is at work.
"The kid's a peach," Fraser said. "He doesn't do one bad thing."
Hospice volunteers who came to the house recently called Jeremy "a saint," Fraser said. "He's so lovable. His belly laugh is contagious."
Prosecutors and police have not offered a motive in the case.
Police had attempted to interview LaBrie prior to charging her, but she declined requests to meet with detectives.
While caring for her son, she was living on Cleveland Road in Salem. Police also had an address for her on Claremont Road in Salem. But LaBrie moved and refused to tell police where, according to the detectives' report. Because they did not know her whereabouts, they sought and obtained an arrest warrant for LaBrie on Friday.
LaBrie turned herself in on the warrant yesterday morning at Salem District Court.
Her lawyer, Kevin James, argued that the charges stem from a "contentious divorce," an argument MacDougall immediately countered by pointing out it was a doctor who reported LaBrie.
James said his client had taken her son to more than 100 visits to Massachusetts General Hospital and "has been extensively involved in this child's care."
He said prosecutors will have a tough time proving the allegations.
"This is a very weak case," James said.
MacDougall asked the judge to set bail for LaBrie at $1,000, given a history of missing court in prior criminal cases. Uhlarik denied the request, releasing LaBrie on personal recognizance, with an order that she have no contact with her son.
"He (her former husband) doesn't let me see him anyway, so that's fine," an emotionless LaBrie said in court.
She is due back in court on Aug. 13.
***********************************************************
The bottom line for me is that this child's life would probably have been saved if Massachusetts had a shared parenting law.
Troubled parents are a fact of life. That's where shared parenting comes in. When parents are less than perfect — which is most of the time – shared parenting allows each parent to be the child's safeguard against failure by the other parent. By ordering sole custody to one parent in most cases, and giving the non-custodial parent only a few days per month with the child, the courts remove the child's best protection against failure of the custodial parent – the other parent.
Jeremy's plight is not at all unusual. The rates of child abuse and neglect are astronomical in single-parent households. The rates for single mothers, their boyfriends and their second husbands significantly exceed those of biological fathers. Many of these children would be protected if their biological dads were allowed more access to their children so they could monitor how their children were being treated.
The overall picture, based on the lengthy conversation with Fraser, is of the family court and the Department of Social Services (DSS — Massachusetts' child protective agency) ignoring mountains of evidence of an unstable mother.
This was so extreme that DSS and the courts switched custody of Karin LaBrie's older son to his father (not Fraser) in 2000. So her parenting limitations were well known by the time of her subsequent divorce from Fraser. Yet she was awarded sole custody of Jeremy, with subsequent tragic results.
By Julie Manganis
Staff writer
SALEM — A mother has been charged with failing to give her 8-year-old son his cancer medication, a decision prosecutors say caused the boy's cancer to return in an untreatable form.
Because of Kristen Anne LaBrie's failure to medicate her child, "in all likelihood, Jeremy Fraser will not see his ninth birthday," prosecutor Kate MacDougall said during LaBrie's arraignment yesterday in Salem District Court.
LaBrie, 36, who moved recently from Salem to Beverly, pleaded not guilty to reckless child endangerment. She refused comment as she left court with her lawyer.
The boy's father, Eric Fraser, who now has full custody of his son, said he is outraged not only about what happened to his son, but that LaBrie was able to walk out of court yesterday without posting any bail.
"I'm pretty disgusted about the whole justice (system) and DSS," Fraser said. "Now my son's going to die."
Jeremy, 8, who is also autistic, had been in remission from non-Hodgkin's lymphoma, but in March the Department of Social Services was contacted by the child's oncologist at Massachusetts General Hospital.
Dr. Alison Friedmann filed a report of suspected neglect with the state after discovering that the child's cancer had returned, something that should not have happened had the child been given his medications.
"It's back and in a far more deadly form," MacDougall told Judge Michael Uhlarik. "He is not expected to survive."
Jeremy's ninth birthday is Aug. 2.
When first diagnosed, Jeremy had a good prognosis, according to a police report, with his chances of recovery put at 85 to 90 percent. But after being deprived of medications, his chances dropped to 10 percent.
"This child was in remission," MacDougall said. "His prognosis was good. This child came out of remission."
But the prosecutor said LaBrie did not fill at least half of the prescriptions her son was given — something the doctor and investigators checked by examining pharmacy and insurance records. She also canceled a number of her son's medical appointments, MacDougall said.
Canceled appointments
According to the police report by Salem detectives Peter Baglioni and Lt. Thomas Griffin, Jeremy was first diagnosed with non-Hodgkin's lymphoma in 2006. The child underwent a five-phase regimen of chemotherapy, including some drugs that were supposed to be given to him at home by his mother.
The detectives said LaBrie had canceled at least a dozen appointments for chemotherapy treatments and had failed to pick up the medications from a pharmacy.
"Due to Ms. LaBrie's failure to provide Jeremy with lifesaving cancer medication, his cancer has returned," the detectives wrote.
Fraser said his ex-wife picked up Jeremy's medication for about a month after he came home from the hospital. Then she just stopped.
Because of ongoing disputes with his ex-wife and her boyfriend, Fraser said, he cut off contact with her and with his son for some months. Then he got a call from LaBrie's sister, who told him Jeremy was back in the hospital and things didn't look good.
Fraser, a full-time UPS delivery driver, was on the road delivering packages a few weeks later when his son's doctor called.
"The doctor said, 'You need to pull over,'" Fraser said.
The doctors and a DSS worker "said Kristen basically stopped giving him his medicine," Fraser said. "She missed four IV chemo appointments and rescheduled 13 of them."
"It comes out to about a year that she didn't continue with the treatment," Fraser said. "They basically said if Jeremy got his at-home chemo he would not have relapsed. The doctor was very shocked that he was back in there so quickly."
Then the doctor told him they couldn't let Jeremy go home with LaBrie. "It's either you or foster care," Fraser recalled being told. The choice was clear.
'A peach' of a kid
Fraser and his son now live with Fraser's father in Saugus. Jeremy still spends part of his day in a special education program, and the rest of Fraser's family helps care for the boy while Fraser is at work.
"The kid's a peach," Fraser said. "He doesn't do one bad thing."
Hospice volunteers who came to the house recently called Jeremy "a saint," Fraser said. "He's so lovable. His belly laugh is contagious."
Prosecutors and police have not offered a motive in the case.
Police had attempted to interview LaBrie prior to charging her, but she declined requests to meet with detectives.
While caring for her son, she was living on Cleveland Road in Salem. Police also had an address for her on Claremont Road in Salem. But LaBrie moved and refused to tell police where, according to the detectives' report. Because they did not know her whereabouts, they sought and obtained an arrest warrant for LaBrie on Friday.
LaBrie turned herself in on the warrant yesterday morning at Salem District Court.
Her lawyer, Kevin James, argued that the charges stem from a "contentious divorce," an argument MacDougall immediately countered by pointing out it was a doctor who reported LaBrie.
James said his client had taken her son to more than 100 visits to Massachusetts General Hospital and "has been extensively involved in this child's care."
He said prosecutors will have a tough time proving the allegations.
"This is a very weak case," James said.
MacDougall asked the judge to set bail for LaBrie at $1,000, given a history of missing court in prior criminal cases. Uhlarik denied the request, releasing LaBrie on personal recognizance, with an order that she have no contact with her son.
"He (her former husband) doesn't let me see him anyway, so that's fine," an emotionless LaBrie said in court.
She is due back in court on Aug. 13.
***********************************************************
The bottom line for me is that this child's life would probably have been saved if Massachusetts had a shared parenting law.
Troubled parents are a fact of life. That's where shared parenting comes in. When parents are less than perfect — which is most of the time – shared parenting allows each parent to be the child's safeguard against failure by the other parent. By ordering sole custody to one parent in most cases, and giving the non-custodial parent only a few days per month with the child, the courts remove the child's best protection against failure of the custodial parent – the other parent.
Jeremy's plight is not at all unusual. The rates of child abuse and neglect are astronomical in single-parent households. The rates for single mothers, their boyfriends and their second husbands significantly exceed those of biological fathers. Many of these children would be protected if their biological dads were allowed more access to their children so they could monitor how their children were being treated.
The overall picture, based on the lengthy conversation with Fraser, is of the family court and the Department of Social Services (DSS — Massachusetts' child protective agency) ignoring mountains of evidence of an unstable mother.
This was so extreme that DSS and the courts switched custody of Karin LaBrie's older son to his father (not Fraser) in 2000. So her parenting limitations were well known by the time of her subsequent divorce from Fraser. Yet she was awarded sole custody of Jeremy, with subsequent tragic results.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
oh yeah, real nice
Police and officials with the office of Children, Youth and Families are searching tonight for a woman whose 5-day-old baby is in critical need of treatment for jaundice.
The mother, Jamie Nesta, 39, and her son, Elijah, were confronted around 12:30 p.m. today in Shadyside by a CYF caseworker who was required to take her son into emergency custody on Wednesday.
Ms. Nesta, with her son in hand, ran from the caseworker and in the process dropped the child's Wallabee III Power Unit medical blanket, which is used to help treat jaundiced babies when they are sent home.
Without the blanket, the baby could suffer irreversible brain damage, according to doctors at Children's Hospital. Jaundice is caused by high rates of bilirubin in a child's blood. The disease causes a yellowing of the skin or eyes.
The blanket device, about the size of a small VCR, helps eliminate bilirubin in the baby's blood by emitting a special light onto the baby's skin that effectively combats jaundice.
The blanket, which needs to be plugged into an outlet to function, can be slipped into another blanket or directly on the baby to help fight jaundice.
"If the bilirubin levels go too high, it causes permanent brain damage," said Dr. Janet Squires, a pediatrician and the director of the Child Advocacy Program at Children's Hospital. "This definitely borders on child endangerment. These are very sad circumstances and this baby may need immediate medical attention."
Dr. Squires said the child may survive for a couple of days or even the rest of his life without the blanket, but that the child needs to be found quickly so that blood tests can be done to determine if the baby is in danger of brain damage.
"What is scary is that we have a baby out there and we don't have its blood levels, so doctors can't decide what to do," Dr. Squires said.
Police described Ms. Nesta as a 5-foot 9-inch tall woman, weighing about 110 pounds with dark brown hair. Detectives attempted to find Ms. Nesta at her last known address on Sarah Street on the South Side, but she was not at that location.
It was possible Ms. Nesta was staying at a shelter, police said.
Emergency custody of the baby was authorized Wednesday, but it was unclear last night why that authorization was issued. CYF officials could not be reached for comment.
Anyone with information is asked to call city police at 412-323-7800.
4:31 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment - Edit - Remove
inactivity
In Starkeisha Brown's small circle of South Los Angeles, it was no secret that her 5-year-old son was the victim of abuse.
Friends and family said they suspected that Brown beat the boy -- and a few even witnessed it. They talked among themselves about what to do, and confronted Brown on at least one occasion.
But no one called authorities.
County child-welfare officials didn't find out about his cigarette burns, whip marks and other injuries until a stranger at a Metro Rail Green Line platform called a county hotline earlier this month after the boy told her: "She put my hand on top of the stove."
The boy's plight has sparked widespread outrage, with the Los Angeles County Board of Supervisors ordering an investigation into why officials couldn't do more to help him.
But the case has also highlighted what experts say is significant problem: family, friends and neighbors suspecting child abuse but choosing not to report it.
Such problems are particularly present in neighborhoods like the one where the Browns lived, where distrust of police and child-protection workers is high and residents worry that calling authorities could make problems worse.
"I don't think it is that they are colluding with the abuser," said Carole Shauffer, executive director of the Youth Law Center, a San Francisco-based public interest law firm. "For the most part, it's fear of what's going to happen, fear of nothing happening, fear of collateral consequences, and denial, that 'it's none of my business, and it can't be as bad as it seems to me.' "
Authorities allege that Brown's son was subjected to extreme abuse for more than a year, including being malnourished, burned with cigarette butts on his body and genitals, hung from a doorjamb by his wrists and whipped, left to sit in his own urine and feces and severely burned on his hands, which were held to a hot stove. Brown and two other women have been charged with child abuse and torture.
Friends and family said they had suspicions but hoped they were unfounded.
The boy's great-grandmother, Barbara Moreno, said she noticed cuts, scratches and bumps on him, but dropped the subject when he told her the injuries were caused by a fall and a dog attack.
"Sometimes you turn your head," said Vivian Daniels, a family friend who about a month ago finally asked Brown about the bruises and scratches on her son's body. She said she didn't call police or the Department of Children and Family Services because she feared it would make things worse for the boy -- and perhaps even for her and her children.
"It's tit-for-tat," Daniels said. "In South-Central, we don't do that. I'm just telling you how it is."
Daniels said she finally decided to talk to Brown about her suspicions around the time she tried to throw an impromptu party for the boy's 5th birthday.
She wrote his name on a birthday cake and hoped he could celebrate at her house with her daughter, whose birthday was around the same time in May. She went to Brown's apartment to ask if her son could go to the party.
"Hell, nah," Brown replied, according to Daniels.
Around the same time, Daniels said she saw Brown "whip the baby butt naked." She said her 11-year-old daughter, Rayonna, had seen the boy hung from a door by his shirt and forced to eat on his hands and knees "like a dog," she said.
"We had heard that the little boy got messed up," Daniels said.
In response to the case, community activists on Friday canvassed the neighborhood around 110th and Figueroa streets, where Brown recently lived with the boy, with fliers that read: "Break the Silence on Child Abuse in South L.A.! Help Make Sure a Starkeisha Brown Torture Case Never Happens Again."
"We have seen time and time again that people say, 'I've seen child abuse, I've heard it, I've heard screams, but I do nothing,' " said Earl Ofari Hutchinson, president of the Los Angeles Urban Policy Roundtable. "People are so reluctant to speak out on it."
Hutchinson and others said suspicion and fear of authorities runs deep in parts of South L.A. -- and that extends beyond the police to social service agencies and other public providers. They said some people are afraid that calling authorities could end up making the family situation worse -- particularly if the child is taken into foster care. Others fear authorities might end up checking on them.
Hutchinson said residents are reluctant to call authorities in such cases because of a strong belief that it's wrong to interfere in the way other parents treat their children.
They "feel that children, no matter what, are really the province of the mother and everything they do is their right and their business," he said. "Someone hears a child screaming, they're not going to say anything because their thinking is that's their child, that's their business."
It took a stranger -- the person on the Green Line platform -- to finally call the county with a tip.
As a result, Brown and the boy were ordered to report June 9 to a children's services office to discuss the abuse allegations. But Brown and her roommate, Krystal Denise Matthews, left the boy with a stranger on the street and instead took a healthy-looking 4-year-old to the meeting, trying to pass him off as Brown's son. They also brought a girl, about 6, authorities said.
The stranger felt uneasy with the 5-year-old, who looked sickly and injured. He asked people nearby what to do, and someone called authorities. County officials have called for a broad-based investigation of the abuse, and Supervisors Mike Antonovich and Gloria Molina earlier this week sponsored an ordinance that would better streamline communication among more than half a dozen county and state agencies that all had information relevant to the boy's situation.
In 2005, county child-welfare officials investigated tips that Brown's son had been abused but closed the file after finding the allegations inconclusive.
Brown is a known gang member who as a minor served time in the California Youth Authority for battery. As an adult she was convicted of robbery and petty theft. In March 2007 she was the subject of an arrest warrant for a parole violation, but authorities could not find her.
Molina and others have noted, however, that she still managed to receive welfare benefits during that time. Abuse like that suffered by the 5-year-old boy is "so common," said Jorja Leap, a professor at UCLA and an expert in crisis intervention and trauma response.
Leap said that in cases like this, the adults who do not report them are dealing with "denial, denial, denial. They absolutely, positively do not want to put the pieces together because it means they would have to do something."
Anyone interested in making donations for the 5-year-old boy can contact Michael Wrice of the county Department of Children and Family Services at (213) 739-6202.
Boy was subject of '05 claim
5-year-old in abuse case was reported at risk, but L.A. County authorities found evidence inconclusive.
By Ari B. Bloomekatz and Andrew Blankstein, Los Angeles Times Staff Writers
June 19, 2008
More than a year before a boy was allegedly subjected to extreme abuse and torture, Los Angeles County officials in 2005 investigated allegations that he suffered from neglect and was at "substantial risk." But officials ultimately determined the claims to be inconclusive, according to county records obtained by The Times.
At the time, the boy's mother, Starkeisha Brown, had been arrested on suspicion of stealing a bracelet and other items at a Macy's department store with the child in tow. The boy stayed with his grandmother while his mother served about nine months in jail -- and the Department of Children and Family Services closed the case file, never returning to check on the boy, the records show.
Brown reunited with him last year, beginning what the Los Angeles Police Department described as "unbearable psychological and physical abuse," including cigarette burns on his body and genitals, near-starvation and beatings.
The details, contained in a DCFS report prepared for Los Angeles County supervisors this week, prompted some officials to ask why social workers didn't have more contact with the family after that initial visit.
"When I read what happened, it seemed like the system broke down on a number of levels, whether it's the criminal justice system, the welfare system or child services," Councilwoman Janice Hahn said. "It seems to me there were a lot of red flags."
Hahn, whose district includes the South Los Angeles neighborhood where the abuse allegedly occurred, said the boy's plight speaks to a larger problem.
"I couldn't believe it," added Supervisor Yvonne Burke. "Our system has to be just tighter. . . . This is a time when we really have to be vigilant. We need to figure out how we can get the ability to find and track down these people."
Police said Brown, 24, and her live-in girlfriend Krystal Matthews, 21, committed the bulk of the abuse. According to one allegation, the 5-year-old was hung by his hands and wrists from a door jamb and whipped with some sort of leash or chain.
The women were arrested over the weekend and each charged with one count of torture and conspiracy, as well as other charges of child abuse, corporal injury to a child and dissuading a witness. Brown's and Matthews' bails were set at $1.1 million and $1.08 million, respectively. If convicted, they face 25 years to life in prison.
La Tanya Monikue Jones, 26, a baby-sitter who authorities said disfigured the boy's hands by burning them on a stove, was also arrested this week and charged with conspiracy to dissuade a witness, corporal injury to a child and child abuse.
Authorities said Jones let her 4-year-old son and her daughter, about 6, go with Brown and Matthews to a meeting with DCFS officials last week in an attempt to trick them into thinking there was no abuse in their home.
DCFS officials have declined to comment on specifics of the case, citing confidentiality rules, but said they get involved only if a problem is reported.
But the confidential report paints a much more detailed and complex picture of the agency's involvement with Brown and her son.
Los Angeles County child welfare authorities first met the boy in November 2005, when officials received at least one report on a hotline expressing concern about his welfare. Details of the call were not contained in the report.
About that time, the county also got a call about the boy from Brown's parole agent. Brown was in custody after being arrested on suspicion of shoplifting, and someone was going to have to look after the boy.
Brown had been released on parole about four months earlier after serving more than a year in prison for robbing an elderly woman and was again on her way to jail. Investigators found the claims of neglect to be "inconclusive" and released the boy to his grandmother, according to the report.
The boy's grandmother told investigators she intended to become his legal guardian, the DCFS report said. But Brown took the child back sometime after she was released from prison in January 2007, according to authorities.
Police detectives say Brown then subjected the boy to ritualistic abuse and torture while evading law enforcement and receiving welfare benefits.
Three months after Brown was released from prison in January 2007, her parole was revoked and a bench warrant was issued for her arrest. Authorities apparently could not find her -- even though she was receiving welfare benefits at the time.
Supervisor Gloria Molina said the boy's plight would be the first case of the Children's Special Investigation Unit, which was set up to independently review and scrutinize DCFS cases.
Molina said that city, state and county agencies were all "pointing the finger at each other" over who was to blame.
According to the confidential report, Brown received treatment from the Department of Mental Health about 10 years ago, and a substance abuse assessment was conducted with a community agency shortly after her child was born.
"However, no services were provided as the mother did not follow through," the report stated.
Jones, the baby-sitter, had lengthy dealings with DCFS, according to the report. When she was arrested for possession of narcotics in March 2003, she left her then 11-month-old baby at a hotel with a stranger. The baby was taken into protective custody two days after the arrest for "caretaker absence/incapacity" but later released.
Both of Jones' children are in protective custody, police said.
Matthews also has a criminal history, including convictions for assault with a deadly weapon and forgery. In May, she got into a fight with her younger brother, slashing him on the face with a box-cutter. She pleaded guilty and was released on three years' probation.
DCFS officials would not respond to direct questions about the abuse of Starkeisha Brown's son, citing confidentiality, but said there had been no open case involving him and that they were alerted to the most recent alleged abuse only early this month.
According to the report, on June 3, Brown, another woman and Brown's son were at a Green Line train station when the child told another person, "She put my hand on top of the stove." The person who called DCFS said the boy "appeared hungry and stated that he had not eaten."
After they received the tip, child welfare officials made three attempts to contact Brown and Matthews at their residence. In the first instance, they were given an incorrect address. After they had the right location, they made two unannounced visits but were unable to find the women and left a note.
The women eventually showed up at the DCFS office in Compton for a scheduled interview. According to authorities, the women first dropped off the 5-year-old with a stranger and took Jones' 4-year-old son to the interview.
Hahn said she was going to urge supervisors to take a thorough look at how the county protects its children.
"We hear problem after problem after problem. When is it going to be enough? It's a shame it takes something like this to make us hold departments accountable," Hahn said. "It is up to us to protect our children, and we failed this child terribly."
2 South L.A. women concocted scheme to hide torturous child abuse, authorities say
The pair allegedly tried to pass off another boy as the son of one of the women during an agency interview. The actual son may be permanently disfigured from stove burns, officials say.
By Andrew Blankstein and Ari B. Bloomekatz, Los Angeles Times Staff Writers
June 17, 2008
» Discuss Article (589 Comments)
For two years, authorities said, a mother subjected her son to what veteran detectives described as shocking, ritualistic abuse.
The 5-year-old was hung by his hands and wrists from a door jamb and beaten with some sort of leash or chain, police said. He was routinely denied food and water, burned with cigarettes on his body and genitals, and left to sit in his own urine and feces.
In the past few weeks, his hands were held to a hot stove, according to Capt. Fabian Lizarraga, causing injuries that may leave them permanently disfigured.
Starkeisha Brown, the boy's 24-year-old mother, allegedly committed the acts for about two years without detection -- until a bizarre series of events last week.
"It causes you to question the humanity of some people," Assistant Police Chief Earl Paysinger said about the abuse. "Whether they have a heart or a soul."
It started with an anonymous tip to the Los Angeles County Department of Children and Family Services saying there was a problem at the South Los Angeles apartment near 110th and Figueroa streets.
On Monday, June 9, Brown and her live-in girlfriend, Krystal Matthews, 19, were ordered to a children services office along with the boy to discuss the allegation of abuse.
Instead, the pair left the abused boy with a complete stranger and attended the meeting with a healthy-looking 4-year-old they said was Brown's son, along with a girl of about 6, authorities said. Police said they are trying to determine those children's identities.
They told the stranger, " 'Watch him for us.' They said 'We'll be right back,' " Lizarraga said.
While the women were being interviewed, the stranger who had been asked to watch the boy started asking people in the neighborhood what he should do with the 5-year-old, who looked sickly and injured. Eventually someone called authorities.
Officials got word of the boy's condition as they were interviewing Brown and Matthews and began asking more pointed questions and challenging the pair's story, Lizarraga said.
Halfway through the interview the two women sprinted from the office, abandoning the 4-year-old and his sister at the office, police said.
"They realize that no one is buying their ruse," said Lt. Vincent Neglia of the LAPD's Abused Child Unit, and "they bug out."
Lizarraga said it was fortunate that the stranger sought help. He "had the sense that something was not right, that the situation he had been placed in was not right," the captain said.
Had Brown brought in her own son, the social worker would have seen a child with a pot belly suggestive of severe malnutrition, burns across his body in various stages of healing, bruises, and badly damaged and burned hands, Neglia said. Some scars appeared to be fairly old.
"This wasn't just one big beating," Neglia said. "You can tell by the different stages of injuries that this was prolonged."
Police said the most severe malnourishment occurred in the last two to three months.
Authorities launched a hunt for Brown and Matthews while authorities took the child to a hospital where he remains.
The boy was in guarded condition through last week, but is beginning to show signs of improvement, authorities said.
Matthews was arrested Friday and Brown turned herself in to police on Saturday.
They were arrested on multiple charges, including suspicion of torture, and the pair are scheduled to be arraigned Tuesday.
Both women have a history of crime and violence. According to court documents, Matthews was sentenced to three years probation earlier this year for assault with a deadly weapon.
The boy's mother served a total of two and a half years in prison for two separate convictions: one for felony robbery of an elderly woman in 2003 and later for petty theft, when she and another woman stole a bracelet and other items from a Macy's department store.
Most recently, Brown was incarcerated from March 2006 to January 2007. During that period, the boy was in the custody of relatives, authorities said.
Police said the bulk of the abuse appeared to begin when Brown was released on probation.
Neglia said that Brown's probation officer recently had a hard time locating her because she was not living at her listed address.
Children services officials, citing confidentiality rules, would not disclose why the boy was returned to his mother after she was released from prison and whether appropriate checks on the boy's welfare were made, given that she was on probation.
DCFS spokesperson Stuart Riskin said there were about 160,000 calls each year to the agency's child protection hotline.
In the South Los Angeles neighborhood where Brown and Matthews lived with the boy, neighbors said they were shocked to hear of the abuse and some said they were angered it had not been reported earlier.
"Everybody's furious," said Katherine Irvin, who recently moved into an adjacent house she said was abandoned by a group of men. "They must've heard something."
Detectives said Monday that they were still trying to determine why a mother would so badly abuse her son.
"So far we have not come up with the answer," Lizarraga said. "Our victim was not on anybody's radar, either law enforcement or DCFS. He wasn't in the system; there was no recent [reported] abuse that could be seen," he said.
Since reports of the abuse became public, dozens of people have called police and social service agencies looking for ways to help the boy, authorities said. One elderly woman called police to see if she could donate her most recent Social Security check, authorities said.
Those interested in contributing can contact Michael Wrice with the DCFS at 213-739-6202.
The mother, Jamie Nesta, 39, and her son, Elijah, were confronted around 12:30 p.m. today in Shadyside by a CYF caseworker who was required to take her son into emergency custody on Wednesday.
Ms. Nesta, with her son in hand, ran from the caseworker and in the process dropped the child's Wallabee III Power Unit medical blanket, which is used to help treat jaundiced babies when they are sent home.
Without the blanket, the baby could suffer irreversible brain damage, according to doctors at Children's Hospital. Jaundice is caused by high rates of bilirubin in a child's blood. The disease causes a yellowing of the skin or eyes.
The blanket device, about the size of a small VCR, helps eliminate bilirubin in the baby's blood by emitting a special light onto the baby's skin that effectively combats jaundice.
The blanket, which needs to be plugged into an outlet to function, can be slipped into another blanket or directly on the baby to help fight jaundice.
"If the bilirubin levels go too high, it causes permanent brain damage," said Dr. Janet Squires, a pediatrician and the director of the Child Advocacy Program at Children's Hospital. "This definitely borders on child endangerment. These are very sad circumstances and this baby may need immediate medical attention."
Dr. Squires said the child may survive for a couple of days or even the rest of his life without the blanket, but that the child needs to be found quickly so that blood tests can be done to determine if the baby is in danger of brain damage.
"What is scary is that we have a baby out there and we don't have its blood levels, so doctors can't decide what to do," Dr. Squires said.
Police described Ms. Nesta as a 5-foot 9-inch tall woman, weighing about 110 pounds with dark brown hair. Detectives attempted to find Ms. Nesta at her last known address on Sarah Street on the South Side, but she was not at that location.
It was possible Ms. Nesta was staying at a shelter, police said.
Emergency custody of the baby was authorized Wednesday, but it was unclear last night why that authorization was issued. CYF officials could not be reached for comment.
Anyone with information is asked to call city police at 412-323-7800.
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In Starkeisha Brown's small circle of South Los Angeles, it was no secret that her 5-year-old son was the victim of abuse.
Friends and family said they suspected that Brown beat the boy -- and a few even witnessed it. They talked among themselves about what to do, and confronted Brown on at least one occasion.
But no one called authorities.
County child-welfare officials didn't find out about his cigarette burns, whip marks and other injuries until a stranger at a Metro Rail Green Line platform called a county hotline earlier this month after the boy told her: "She put my hand on top of the stove."
The boy's plight has sparked widespread outrage, with the Los Angeles County Board of Supervisors ordering an investigation into why officials couldn't do more to help him.
But the case has also highlighted what experts say is significant problem: family, friends and neighbors suspecting child abuse but choosing not to report it.
Such problems are particularly present in neighborhoods like the one where the Browns lived, where distrust of police and child-protection workers is high and residents worry that calling authorities could make problems worse.
"I don't think it is that they are colluding with the abuser," said Carole Shauffer, executive director of the Youth Law Center, a San Francisco-based public interest law firm. "For the most part, it's fear of what's going to happen, fear of nothing happening, fear of collateral consequences, and denial, that 'it's none of my business, and it can't be as bad as it seems to me.' "
Authorities allege that Brown's son was subjected to extreme abuse for more than a year, including being malnourished, burned with cigarette butts on his body and genitals, hung from a doorjamb by his wrists and whipped, left to sit in his own urine and feces and severely burned on his hands, which were held to a hot stove. Brown and two other women have been charged with child abuse and torture.
Friends and family said they had suspicions but hoped they were unfounded.
The boy's great-grandmother, Barbara Moreno, said she noticed cuts, scratches and bumps on him, but dropped the subject when he told her the injuries were caused by a fall and a dog attack.
"Sometimes you turn your head," said Vivian Daniels, a family friend who about a month ago finally asked Brown about the bruises and scratches on her son's body. She said she didn't call police or the Department of Children and Family Services because she feared it would make things worse for the boy -- and perhaps even for her and her children.
"It's tit-for-tat," Daniels said. "In South-Central, we don't do that. I'm just telling you how it is."
Daniels said she finally decided to talk to Brown about her suspicions around the time she tried to throw an impromptu party for the boy's 5th birthday.
She wrote his name on a birthday cake and hoped he could celebrate at her house with her daughter, whose birthday was around the same time in May. She went to Brown's apartment to ask if her son could go to the party.
"Hell, nah," Brown replied, according to Daniels.
Around the same time, Daniels said she saw Brown "whip the baby butt naked." She said her 11-year-old daughter, Rayonna, had seen the boy hung from a door by his shirt and forced to eat on his hands and knees "like a dog," she said.
"We had heard that the little boy got messed up," Daniels said.
In response to the case, community activists on Friday canvassed the neighborhood around 110th and Figueroa streets, where Brown recently lived with the boy, with fliers that read: "Break the Silence on Child Abuse in South L.A.! Help Make Sure a Starkeisha Brown Torture Case Never Happens Again."
"We have seen time and time again that people say, 'I've seen child abuse, I've heard it, I've heard screams, but I do nothing,' " said Earl Ofari Hutchinson, president of the Los Angeles Urban Policy Roundtable. "People are so reluctant to speak out on it."
Hutchinson and others said suspicion and fear of authorities runs deep in parts of South L.A. -- and that extends beyond the police to social service agencies and other public providers. They said some people are afraid that calling authorities could end up making the family situation worse -- particularly if the child is taken into foster care. Others fear authorities might end up checking on them.
Hutchinson said residents are reluctant to call authorities in such cases because of a strong belief that it's wrong to interfere in the way other parents treat their children.
They "feel that children, no matter what, are really the province of the mother and everything they do is their right and their business," he said. "Someone hears a child screaming, they're not going to say anything because their thinking is that's their child, that's their business."
It took a stranger -- the person on the Green Line platform -- to finally call the county with a tip.
As a result, Brown and the boy were ordered to report June 9 to a children's services office to discuss the abuse allegations. But Brown and her roommate, Krystal Denise Matthews, left the boy with a stranger on the street and instead took a healthy-looking 4-year-old to the meeting, trying to pass him off as Brown's son. They also brought a girl, about 6, authorities said.
The stranger felt uneasy with the 5-year-old, who looked sickly and injured. He asked people nearby what to do, and someone called authorities. County officials have called for a broad-based investigation of the abuse, and Supervisors Mike Antonovich and Gloria Molina earlier this week sponsored an ordinance that would better streamline communication among more than half a dozen county and state agencies that all had information relevant to the boy's situation.
In 2005, county child-welfare officials investigated tips that Brown's son had been abused but closed the file after finding the allegations inconclusive.
Brown is a known gang member who as a minor served time in the California Youth Authority for battery. As an adult she was convicted of robbery and petty theft. In March 2007 she was the subject of an arrest warrant for a parole violation, but authorities could not find her.
Molina and others have noted, however, that she still managed to receive welfare benefits during that time. Abuse like that suffered by the 5-year-old boy is "so common," said Jorja Leap, a professor at UCLA and an expert in crisis intervention and trauma response.
Leap said that in cases like this, the adults who do not report them are dealing with "denial, denial, denial. They absolutely, positively do not want to put the pieces together because it means they would have to do something."
Anyone interested in making donations for the 5-year-old boy can contact Michael Wrice of the county Department of Children and Family Services at (213) 739-6202.
Boy was subject of '05 claim
5-year-old in abuse case was reported at risk, but L.A. County authorities found evidence inconclusive.
By Ari B. Bloomekatz and Andrew Blankstein, Los Angeles Times Staff Writers
June 19, 2008
More than a year before a boy was allegedly subjected to extreme abuse and torture, Los Angeles County officials in 2005 investigated allegations that he suffered from neglect and was at "substantial risk." But officials ultimately determined the claims to be inconclusive, according to county records obtained by The Times.
At the time, the boy's mother, Starkeisha Brown, had been arrested on suspicion of stealing a bracelet and other items at a Macy's department store with the child in tow. The boy stayed with his grandmother while his mother served about nine months in jail -- and the Department of Children and Family Services closed the case file, never returning to check on the boy, the records show.
Brown reunited with him last year, beginning what the Los Angeles Police Department described as "unbearable psychological and physical abuse," including cigarette burns on his body and genitals, near-starvation and beatings.
The details, contained in a DCFS report prepared for Los Angeles County supervisors this week, prompted some officials to ask why social workers didn't have more contact with the family after that initial visit.
"When I read what happened, it seemed like the system broke down on a number of levels, whether it's the criminal justice system, the welfare system or child services," Councilwoman Janice Hahn said. "It seems to me there were a lot of red flags."
Hahn, whose district includes the South Los Angeles neighborhood where the abuse allegedly occurred, said the boy's plight speaks to a larger problem.
"I couldn't believe it," added Supervisor Yvonne Burke. "Our system has to be just tighter. . . . This is a time when we really have to be vigilant. We need to figure out how we can get the ability to find and track down these people."
Police said Brown, 24, and her live-in girlfriend Krystal Matthews, 21, committed the bulk of the abuse. According to one allegation, the 5-year-old was hung by his hands and wrists from a door jamb and whipped with some sort of leash or chain.
The women were arrested over the weekend and each charged with one count of torture and conspiracy, as well as other charges of child abuse, corporal injury to a child and dissuading a witness. Brown's and Matthews' bails were set at $1.1 million and $1.08 million, respectively. If convicted, they face 25 years to life in prison.
La Tanya Monikue Jones, 26, a baby-sitter who authorities said disfigured the boy's hands by burning them on a stove, was also arrested this week and charged with conspiracy to dissuade a witness, corporal injury to a child and child abuse.
Authorities said Jones let her 4-year-old son and her daughter, about 6, go with Brown and Matthews to a meeting with DCFS officials last week in an attempt to trick them into thinking there was no abuse in their home.
DCFS officials have declined to comment on specifics of the case, citing confidentiality rules, but said they get involved only if a problem is reported.
But the confidential report paints a much more detailed and complex picture of the agency's involvement with Brown and her son.
Los Angeles County child welfare authorities first met the boy in November 2005, when officials received at least one report on a hotline expressing concern about his welfare. Details of the call were not contained in the report.
About that time, the county also got a call about the boy from Brown's parole agent. Brown was in custody after being arrested on suspicion of shoplifting, and someone was going to have to look after the boy.
Brown had been released on parole about four months earlier after serving more than a year in prison for robbing an elderly woman and was again on her way to jail. Investigators found the claims of neglect to be "inconclusive" and released the boy to his grandmother, according to the report.
The boy's grandmother told investigators she intended to become his legal guardian, the DCFS report said. But Brown took the child back sometime after she was released from prison in January 2007, according to authorities.
Police detectives say Brown then subjected the boy to ritualistic abuse and torture while evading law enforcement and receiving welfare benefits.
Three months after Brown was released from prison in January 2007, her parole was revoked and a bench warrant was issued for her arrest. Authorities apparently could not find her -- even though she was receiving welfare benefits at the time.
Supervisor Gloria Molina said the boy's plight would be the first case of the Children's Special Investigation Unit, which was set up to independently review and scrutinize DCFS cases.
Molina said that city, state and county agencies were all "pointing the finger at each other" over who was to blame.
According to the confidential report, Brown received treatment from the Department of Mental Health about 10 years ago, and a substance abuse assessment was conducted with a community agency shortly after her child was born.
"However, no services were provided as the mother did not follow through," the report stated.
Jones, the baby-sitter, had lengthy dealings with DCFS, according to the report. When she was arrested for possession of narcotics in March 2003, she left her then 11-month-old baby at a hotel with a stranger. The baby was taken into protective custody two days after the arrest for "caretaker absence/incapacity" but later released.
Both of Jones' children are in protective custody, police said.
Matthews also has a criminal history, including convictions for assault with a deadly weapon and forgery. In May, she got into a fight with her younger brother, slashing him on the face with a box-cutter. She pleaded guilty and was released on three years' probation.
DCFS officials would not respond to direct questions about the abuse of Starkeisha Brown's son, citing confidentiality, but said there had been no open case involving him and that they were alerted to the most recent alleged abuse only early this month.
According to the report, on June 3, Brown, another woman and Brown's son were at a Green Line train station when the child told another person, "She put my hand on top of the stove." The person who called DCFS said the boy "appeared hungry and stated that he had not eaten."
After they received the tip, child welfare officials made three attempts to contact Brown and Matthews at their residence. In the first instance, they were given an incorrect address. After they had the right location, they made two unannounced visits but were unable to find the women and left a note.
The women eventually showed up at the DCFS office in Compton for a scheduled interview. According to authorities, the women first dropped off the 5-year-old with a stranger and took Jones' 4-year-old son to the interview.
Hahn said she was going to urge supervisors to take a thorough look at how the county protects its children.
"We hear problem after problem after problem. When is it going to be enough? It's a shame it takes something like this to make us hold departments accountable," Hahn said. "It is up to us to protect our children, and we failed this child terribly."
2 South L.A. women concocted scheme to hide torturous child abuse, authorities say
The pair allegedly tried to pass off another boy as the son of one of the women during an agency interview. The actual son may be permanently disfigured from stove burns, officials say.
By Andrew Blankstein and Ari B. Bloomekatz, Los Angeles Times Staff Writers
June 17, 2008
» Discuss Article (589 Comments)
For two years, authorities said, a mother subjected her son to what veteran detectives described as shocking, ritualistic abuse.
The 5-year-old was hung by his hands and wrists from a door jamb and beaten with some sort of leash or chain, police said. He was routinely denied food and water, burned with cigarettes on his body and genitals, and left to sit in his own urine and feces.
In the past few weeks, his hands were held to a hot stove, according to Capt. Fabian Lizarraga, causing injuries that may leave them permanently disfigured.
Starkeisha Brown, the boy's 24-year-old mother, allegedly committed the acts for about two years without detection -- until a bizarre series of events last week.
"It causes you to question the humanity of some people," Assistant Police Chief Earl Paysinger said about the abuse. "Whether they have a heart or a soul."
It started with an anonymous tip to the Los Angeles County Department of Children and Family Services saying there was a problem at the South Los Angeles apartment near 110th and Figueroa streets.
On Monday, June 9, Brown and her live-in girlfriend, Krystal Matthews, 19, were ordered to a children services office along with the boy to discuss the allegation of abuse.
Instead, the pair left the abused boy with a complete stranger and attended the meeting with a healthy-looking 4-year-old they said was Brown's son, along with a girl of about 6, authorities said. Police said they are trying to determine those children's identities.
They told the stranger, " 'Watch him for us.' They said 'We'll be right back,' " Lizarraga said.
While the women were being interviewed, the stranger who had been asked to watch the boy started asking people in the neighborhood what he should do with the 5-year-old, who looked sickly and injured. Eventually someone called authorities.
Officials got word of the boy's condition as they were interviewing Brown and Matthews and began asking more pointed questions and challenging the pair's story, Lizarraga said.
Halfway through the interview the two women sprinted from the office, abandoning the 4-year-old and his sister at the office, police said.
"They realize that no one is buying their ruse," said Lt. Vincent Neglia of the LAPD's Abused Child Unit, and "they bug out."
Lizarraga said it was fortunate that the stranger sought help. He "had the sense that something was not right, that the situation he had been placed in was not right," the captain said.
Had Brown brought in her own son, the social worker would have seen a child with a pot belly suggestive of severe malnutrition, burns across his body in various stages of healing, bruises, and badly damaged and burned hands, Neglia said. Some scars appeared to be fairly old.
"This wasn't just one big beating," Neglia said. "You can tell by the different stages of injuries that this was prolonged."
Police said the most severe malnourishment occurred in the last two to three months.
Authorities launched a hunt for Brown and Matthews while authorities took the child to a hospital where he remains.
The boy was in guarded condition through last week, but is beginning to show signs of improvement, authorities said.
Matthews was arrested Friday and Brown turned herself in to police on Saturday.
They were arrested on multiple charges, including suspicion of torture, and the pair are scheduled to be arraigned Tuesday.
Both women have a history of crime and violence. According to court documents, Matthews was sentenced to three years probation earlier this year for assault with a deadly weapon.
The boy's mother served a total of two and a half years in prison for two separate convictions: one for felony robbery of an elderly woman in 2003 and later for petty theft, when she and another woman stole a bracelet and other items from a Macy's department store.
Most recently, Brown was incarcerated from March 2006 to January 2007. During that period, the boy was in the custody of relatives, authorities said.
Police said the bulk of the abuse appeared to begin when Brown was released on probation.
Neglia said that Brown's probation officer recently had a hard time locating her because she was not living at her listed address.
Children services officials, citing confidentiality rules, would not disclose why the boy was returned to his mother after she was released from prison and whether appropriate checks on the boy's welfare were made, given that she was on probation.
DCFS spokesperson Stuart Riskin said there were about 160,000 calls each year to the agency's child protection hotline.
In the South Los Angeles neighborhood where Brown and Matthews lived with the boy, neighbors said they were shocked to hear of the abuse and some said they were angered it had not been reported earlier.
"Everybody's furious," said Katherine Irvin, who recently moved into an adjacent house she said was abandoned by a group of men. "They must've heard something."
Detectives said Monday that they were still trying to determine why a mother would so badly abuse her son.
"So far we have not come up with the answer," Lizarraga said. "Our victim was not on anybody's radar, either law enforcement or DCFS. He wasn't in the system; there was no recent [reported] abuse that could be seen," he said.
Since reports of the abuse became public, dozens of people have called police and social service agencies looking for ways to help the boy, authorities said. One elderly woman called police to see if she could donate her most recent Social Security check, authorities said.
Those interested in contributing can contact Michael Wrice with the DCFS at 213-739-6202.
one more mother of the year...
PRATTVILLE -- A Prattville woman Tuesday was charged with
planting nude images of her child in her ex-husband's home, just one day
after police accused her of conspiring to kill the man over a custody
dispute, law enforcement officials said.
Shannon Marie Lorenzo, 32, is accused of breaking into her
ex-husband's home and taking a picture of her 2-year-old child naked
while holding an erotic toy. She is also accused of planting other
images of child pornography, officials said.
She is charged with two counts of permitting a child to
engage in production of obscene material, one count of possession of
obscene material, and one count of conspiracy to commit murder,
officials said. She also faces burglary and theft charges, some
unrelated to the case involving her ex-husband, Chad Baker.
"This is definitely not the way to resolve a custody
dispute," District Attorney Randall Houston said. "She didn't want to
share custody, for whatever reason. Now she's looking at some serious
stuff here. I'm happy nobody's dead."
She faces a maximum of more than three life sentences if
convicted, officials said, and more charges may be filed within the next
few days.
Reached at home Tuesday night, Baker declined to discuss
the situation in detail.
"I'm not going to say anything to anybody until the
investigators have everything they need. It's just been a lot ... It's
just been so much," he said.
Lorenzo was arrested on the conspiracy to commit murder
charge Sunday after she returned to Prattville from Louisiana.
Law enforcement officials said they had staged the
disappearance of her ex-husband but would not elaborate as to how they
did so. They declined to release specific details leading to her arrest
and the six-month-long investigation.
She is accused of trying to hire an undercover Federal
Bureau of Investigations agent to kill her ex-husband, Houston said.
"You just can't trust these hired killers. You never know
when they're FBI agents," Houston said.
planting nude images of her child in her ex-husband's home, just one day
after police accused her of conspiring to kill the man over a custody
dispute, law enforcement officials said.
Shannon Marie Lorenzo, 32, is accused of breaking into her
ex-husband's home and taking a picture of her 2-year-old child naked
while holding an erotic toy. She is also accused of planting other
images of child pornography, officials said.
She is charged with two counts of permitting a child to
engage in production of obscene material, one count of possession of
obscene material, and one count of conspiracy to commit murder,
officials said. She also faces burglary and theft charges, some
unrelated to the case involving her ex-husband, Chad Baker.
"This is definitely not the way to resolve a custody
dispute," District Attorney Randall Houston said. "She didn't want to
share custody, for whatever reason. Now she's looking at some serious
stuff here. I'm happy nobody's dead."
She faces a maximum of more than three life sentences if
convicted, officials said, and more charges may be filed within the next
few days.
Reached at home Tuesday night, Baker declined to discuss
the situation in detail.
"I'm not going to say anything to anybody until the
investigators have everything they need. It's just been a lot ... It's
just been so much," he said.
Lorenzo was arrested on the conspiracy to commit murder
charge Sunday after she returned to Prattville from Louisiana.
Law enforcement officials said they had staged the
disappearance of her ex-husband but would not elaborate as to how they
did so. They declined to release specific details leading to her arrest
and the six-month-long investigation.
She is accused of trying to hire an undercover Federal
Bureau of Investigations agent to kill her ex-husband, Houston said.
"You just can't trust these hired killers. You never know
when they're FBI agents," Houston said.
Saturday, June 28, 2008
fucking YAY!
IT'S ABOUT DAMN TIME---------------------->
HR1101 Enrolled
LRB095 20536 AJO 48482 r
1
HOUSE RESOLUTION 1101
2
WHEREAS, It has been more than 30 years since the enactment
3
of the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act; and
4
WHEREAS, American society and law have undergone
5
significant and numerous changes particularly affecting
6
families and family law; and
7
WHEREAS, The General Assembly has dealt with these changes
8
only by amending individual sections of the Act without regard
9
to the overall statutory scheme of the Act; and
10
WHEREAS, It is time for a thorough and comprehensive review
11
of the Act to improve and update it in the context of these
12
changes in the last 30 years; therefore, be it
13
RESOLVED, BY THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES OF THE
14
NINETY-FIFTH GENERAL ASSEMBLY OF THE STATE OF ILLINOIS, that
15
the Illinois Family-Law Study Committee is created to study and
16
recommend how the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage
17
Act should be amended to improve and update it; and be it
18
further
19
RESOLVED, That the Committee shall consist of the following
20
members:
HR1101 Enrolled - 2 - LRB095 20536 AJO 48482 r
1
(1) Four members appointed by the Speaker of the House
2
of Representatives, one of whom shall be designated by the
3
Speaker to serve as the chairperson of the Committee;
4
(2) Four members appointed by the Minority Leader of
5
the House of Representatives;
6
(3) Two members appointed by the Supreme Court of
7
Illinois, one each from (1) an Illinois statewide bar
8
association and (2) a metropolitan bar association; and
9
(4) Two members appointed by the Illinois Child Support
10
Advisory Committee, one of whom is (1) its chairperson or
11
designee and (2) a member of a statewide organization whose
12
membership is exclusively comprised of matrimonial
13
lawyers; and be it further
14
RESOLVED, That the Committee should seek voluntary
15
assistance from education, legal, civic, and professional
16
organizations and institutions in its review; and be it further
17
RESOLVED, That the members of the Committee shall serve
18
without compensation but may be reimbursed for actual expenses
19
incurred while serving on this Committee from funds
20
appropriated to the Department of Healthcare and Family
21
Services' budget for that purpose; and be it further
22
RESOLVED, That the Committee shall submit its final report
23
to the Governor and the House of Representatives on or before
HR1101 Enrolled - 3 - LRB095 20536 AJO 48482 r
1
December 31, 2008.
HR1101 Enrolled
LRB095 20536 AJO 48482 r
1
HOUSE RESOLUTION 1101
2
WHEREAS, It has been more than 30 years since the enactment
3
of the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act; and
4
WHEREAS, American society and law have undergone
5
significant and numerous changes particularly affecting
6
families and family law; and
7
WHEREAS, The General Assembly has dealt with these changes
8
only by amending individual sections of the Act without regard
9
to the overall statutory scheme of the Act; and
10
WHEREAS, It is time for a thorough and comprehensive review
11
of the Act to improve and update it in the context of these
12
changes in the last 30 years; therefore, be it
13
RESOLVED, BY THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES OF THE
14
NINETY-FIFTH GENERAL ASSEMBLY OF THE STATE OF ILLINOIS, that
15
the Illinois Family-Law Study Committee is created to study and
16
recommend how the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage
17
Act should be amended to improve and update it; and be it
18
further
19
RESOLVED, That the Committee shall consist of the following
20
members:
HR1101 Enrolled - 2 - LRB095 20536 AJO 48482 r
1
(1) Four members appointed by the Speaker of the House
2
of Representatives, one of whom shall be designated by the
3
Speaker to serve as the chairperson of the Committee;
4
(2) Four members appointed by the Minority Leader of
5
the House of Representatives;
6
(3) Two members appointed by the Supreme Court of
7
Illinois, one each from (1) an Illinois statewide bar
8
association and (2) a metropolitan bar association; and
9
(4) Two members appointed by the Illinois Child Support
10
Advisory Committee, one of whom is (1) its chairperson or
11
designee and (2) a member of a statewide organization whose
12
membership is exclusively comprised of matrimonial
13
lawyers; and be it further
14
RESOLVED, That the Committee should seek voluntary
15
assistance from education, legal, civic, and professional
16
organizations and institutions in its review; and be it further
17
RESOLVED, That the members of the Committee shall serve
18
without compensation but may be reimbursed for actual expenses
19
incurred while serving on this Committee from funds
20
appropriated to the Department of Healthcare and Family
21
Services' budget for that purpose; and be it further
22
RESOLVED, That the Committee shall submit its final report
23
to the Governor and the House of Representatives on or before
HR1101 Enrolled - 3 - LRB095 20536 AJO 48482 r
1
December 31, 2008.
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
wtf...why? no, for real....why?
This is what she did to Nina's arm the night before they left for camp.
i know what your logical, rational minds are thinking right now...."omg! now nina's stealing too!!!!!"
no, friends....she's not. she got that because she wasn't cleaning her room fast enough for her mothers liking.
yeah.
she got whipped with a belt on her upper arms like a fucking slave in the deep south because she wasn't cleaning fast enough.
this is what it looked like in the morning, hours before she left for camp:
Personally, I'm amazed dcfs wasn't waiting for us when we got home.
That's why i ask "why?"
Why not just spank her on the bottom-where spanking belongs. Why beat her and leave marks in the most visible place possible-you want to be caught? you want to be investigated by dcfs for the THIRD TIME?
Maybe she thought we wouldn't send her. She tried very, very hard to sabatoge the trip. She said she would provide clothing-what she sent did not fit, was inappropriate for camping and playing, and was actually dirty laundry. Not just that it didn't smell fresh-or that it was stained-it had food crusted on to it-the kind of crust where-had it been hit with water-it would not be there. Not to mention-most of it was clothes I bought them and they wore over there-and I hadn't seen in months and months.
Then the bathing suits. The camp only allows one-piece bathing suits. I only have two piece bathing suits for them. She says they have one-piece bathing suits over there. ok. please send them. since they haven't worn them in a year-they need to try them on, of course and make sure they still fit. i ask that she let me know immediately if they don't fit so i can go get them suits that fit(even tho-i'm not working-and i really can't afford it-but they need them-so i gotta do what i gotta do)friday night they come with the bathing suits-i say-oh good, they still fit. they tell me they don't know if they still fit. their mother told them NOT to try them on and if they don't fit-"oh well."
THIS COCKEATING BITCH.
sorry. it's been a couple days....but the whole way that went down still gets me heated.
They also have THREE SWEATERS A PIECE that i bought them for over here. All of them are over at her fucking sty cuz they wear them to school on monday and never bring em back.
And lace-up gym shoes I bought them for school. Also over there-because she likes to send them in dollar store flip-flops.
I want to send a sweater with them in case it is rainy or cold-as it HAS been up in wisconsin the past couple days. I also want to send them in lace-up gym shoes-because how are you supposed to run around and play or go on hikes in the woods with flip-flops......SHE REFUSES TO LET US COME GET THESE THINGS.
She tried every way possible to stop them from going on this trip. And I hate her for that. And while I think she is truly an idiot-I don't out it past her to fucking beat on her daughter in the most visible place possible just to try and stop her from going.
My poor nina. But everything worked out. I will never let her win. And I'll do everything in my power to make sure she can't take away any more of their childhood than she already has.
i know what your logical, rational minds are thinking right now...."omg! now nina's stealing too!!!!!"
no, friends....she's not. she got that because she wasn't cleaning her room fast enough for her mothers liking.
yeah.
she got whipped with a belt on her upper arms like a fucking slave in the deep south because she wasn't cleaning fast enough.
this is what it looked like in the morning, hours before she left for camp:
Personally, I'm amazed dcfs wasn't waiting for us when we got home.
That's why i ask "why?"
Why not just spank her on the bottom-where spanking belongs. Why beat her and leave marks in the most visible place possible-you want to be caught? you want to be investigated by dcfs for the THIRD TIME?
Maybe she thought we wouldn't send her. She tried very, very hard to sabatoge the trip. She said she would provide clothing-what she sent did not fit, was inappropriate for camping and playing, and was actually dirty laundry. Not just that it didn't smell fresh-or that it was stained-it had food crusted on to it-the kind of crust where-had it been hit with water-it would not be there. Not to mention-most of it was clothes I bought them and they wore over there-and I hadn't seen in months and months.
Then the bathing suits. The camp only allows one-piece bathing suits. I only have two piece bathing suits for them. She says they have one-piece bathing suits over there. ok. please send them. since they haven't worn them in a year-they need to try them on, of course and make sure they still fit. i ask that she let me know immediately if they don't fit so i can go get them suits that fit(even tho-i'm not working-and i really can't afford it-but they need them-so i gotta do what i gotta do)friday night they come with the bathing suits-i say-oh good, they still fit. they tell me they don't know if they still fit. their mother told them NOT to try them on and if they don't fit-"oh well."
THIS COCKEATING BITCH.
sorry. it's been a couple days....but the whole way that went down still gets me heated.
They also have THREE SWEATERS A PIECE that i bought them for over here. All of them are over at her fucking sty cuz they wear them to school on monday and never bring em back.
And lace-up gym shoes I bought them for school. Also over there-because she likes to send them in dollar store flip-flops.
I want to send a sweater with them in case it is rainy or cold-as it HAS been up in wisconsin the past couple days. I also want to send them in lace-up gym shoes-because how are you supposed to run around and play or go on hikes in the woods with flip-flops......SHE REFUSES TO LET US COME GET THESE THINGS.
She tried every way possible to stop them from going on this trip. And I hate her for that. And while I think she is truly an idiot-I don't out it past her to fucking beat on her daughter in the most visible place possible just to try and stop her from going.
My poor nina. But everything worked out. I will never let her win. And I'll do everything in my power to make sure she can't take away any more of their childhood than she already has.
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Sunday, June 8, 2008
Kleptomania
Friends. the child. has lost. her mind.
she waited until everyone in the house went to sleep, crept out of her bed and down the hall and stole fifty-one dollars from her fathers' pants pocket.
her father. the one who spent 6grand fighting a custody battle just so that child could be there on sunday nights so she could steal from him.
he looked everywhere. he went all over the house, outside, in the car, and i know he would rather have lost every dime of that money and never seen it again-instead of going into his daughters' room and finding it in her bed.
he's so hurt. so betrayed. he couldn't even spank her. this morning...he...he tried. he gave a couple whaps. but i could tell that's not what he wanted to do. he didn't want to discipline her.
he didn't want to punish her.
he wanted to break down and cry.
he wanted her to tell him why-give him some coherent reason-no matter how petty.
but there aren't any answers.
the child did not go to school.
her missing one of the last three days isn't going to change any of her f's anyway. and she'd just go and talk to her friends and ignore her teacher and blow off her classwork and then get to hang out with all those badass little girls afterschool while she waits for her eggdonor to pick her up...and it'd be a regular monday. nothing remarkable.
no. she's here. with me. and this will be a day she remembers because i am putting her thru everything my head can concoct. she says she's sorry...but she's not sorry yet. and while she may remember this day for the torture and the
------->PUBLIC_HUMILIATION<-------
i know i'll never forget this day. this is the day she broke her daddy's heart.
AND IF ANYONE HAS ANYTHING THEY WOULD LIKE TO SAY TO HER-PLEASE-YOU ARE MORE THAN WELCOME TO ADD THE COMMENT AND SHE WILL HEAR IT. AND IF YOU HAVE ANY PUNISHMENT SUGGESTIONS-WE'RE OPEN ALL DAY.
JUST DON'T BOTHER WITH ANY THEORIES ON WHY SHE DID IT OR HOW IT'S "NOT SO BAD" OR ANY OF THAT NORMAL CHILD BEHAVIOR JUNK. BECAUSE TRUST ME-THE PILE OF STRAW ON THIS CAMELS BACK IS HUCKING FUMONGOUS
JUST DON'T BOTHER WITH ANY THEORIES ON WHY SHE DID IT OR HOW IT'S "NOT SO BAD" OR ANY OF THAT NORMAL CHILD BEHAVIOR JUNK. BECAUSE TRUST ME-THE PILE OF STRAW ON THIS CAMELS BACK IS HUCKING FUMONGOUS
Saturday, May 31, 2008
no more red headed sluts
Omfg my head. Went out with jen last night. Had fun.
Too much fun-oh-my effing head.
I haven't hurled off some liquor in a very long time.....but j seems to always bring that outta me...
Vans so awesome tho. He took such good care of me. He always does. How'd I get so lucky?
Ugh. My head.
Love you babe.
Love you j.
Btw-saw j in a dress for the first time in SEVEN YEARS. HAWT. Effing hawt.
Too much fun-oh-my effing head.
I haven't hurled off some liquor in a very long time.....but j seems to always bring that outta me...
Vans so awesome tho. He took such good care of me. He always does. How'd I get so lucky?
Ugh. My head.
Love you babe.
Love you j.
Btw-saw j in a dress for the first time in SEVEN YEARS. HAWT. Effing hawt.
Thursday, May 22, 2008
buck flagojevich
Guilty Until Proven Innocent: A Recurring Story
May 20th, 2008 by Ned Holstein, MD, MS
Springfield, IL—The Belleville News-Democrat in Illinois reports that the Illinois Department of Children and Family Services (DCFS) "wrongly placed more than 3,000 people on the State's official list of child abusers over a five year period…"
Why should the family court reform movement care about what happens to child abusers? After all, a lot of these parents are less-then-perfect, and they probably did something wrong, you say.
The reason we care is that non-custodial parents are often up against the same problems as men and women falsely accused of child abuse: arrogant, self-righteous government officials who have been given too much power and are accountable to no one.
Listen to the complaints of the victims and their attorneys and you will hear a familiar echo.
Nick Brunstein, one falsely accused foster parent said of child abuse investigators, "…the bad ones have the power of God and with the stroke of a pen they can ruin your life." Sounds pretty much like a GAL or a family court judge doesn't it?
Diane Redleaf, executive director of the non-profit Family Defense Center in Chicago said, "We see so many cases where the basic rules are being ignored completely by the state investigators." This too has a familiar ring.
Chicago attorney Robert Lehrer said, "They [the accused parents] can't afford a lawyer and don't believe they have a chance." So most give up and back down. Sound familiar?
Although Brunstein and his wife eventually won in court, he said, "Our savings are wiped out, and our caseworker who wanted to take our foster kids and hurt us did exactly that. No one at DCFS will be held accountable." Hundreds of our members could say the same thing about family court.
What is the attitude of the DCFS when confronted with over 3,000 mistakes they made? Spokesman Kendall Marlowe "acknowledged that mistakes are made, but he said the vast majority of people… were placed there properly… he declined further comment."
The DCFS chief administrative law judge Meryl Paniak said "A lot of what happens at these hearings is it becomes a legal process, not… whether it happened or not, but whether enough evidence is presented."
Not a hint of apology, not a whiff of promise to a better job. In one word, arrogant.
DCFS hearings are closed to the public. They admit hearsay evidence. The decisions of their judges are not open to the public. They cannot be sued for mistakes, even when the mistakes are egregious, or downright malicious. The legal standard to which they are held is ridiculously low: the DCFS makes its decisions based only on "credible evidence." In other words, the judges can do pretty much whatever they feel like.
Basically, they are secret courts. Secret courts breed corruption no matter how lofty their reasons sound for being secret. The secret legal proceedings at Guantanamo have caused an uproar, but where is the uproar over the hundreds of thousands of secret proceedings in family court and in child abuse cases?
Sooner or later, this movement is going to have to take on the widespread abuses of the child protective services.
May 20th, 2008 by Ned Holstein, MD, MS
Springfield, IL—The Belleville News-Democrat in Illinois reports that the Illinois Department of Children and Family Services (DCFS) "wrongly placed more than 3,000 people on the State's official list of child abusers over a five year period…"
Why should the family court reform movement care about what happens to child abusers? After all, a lot of these parents are less-then-perfect, and they probably did something wrong, you say.
The reason we care is that non-custodial parents are often up against the same problems as men and women falsely accused of child abuse: arrogant, self-righteous government officials who have been given too much power and are accountable to no one.
Listen to the complaints of the victims and their attorneys and you will hear a familiar echo.
Nick Brunstein, one falsely accused foster parent said of child abuse investigators, "…the bad ones have the power of God and with the stroke of a pen they can ruin your life." Sounds pretty much like a GAL or a family court judge doesn't it?
Diane Redleaf, executive director of the non-profit Family Defense Center in Chicago said, "We see so many cases where the basic rules are being ignored completely by the state investigators." This too has a familiar ring.
Chicago attorney Robert Lehrer said, "They [the accused parents] can't afford a lawyer and don't believe they have a chance." So most give up and back down. Sound familiar?
Although Brunstein and his wife eventually won in court, he said, "Our savings are wiped out, and our caseworker who wanted to take our foster kids and hurt us did exactly that. No one at DCFS will be held accountable." Hundreds of our members could say the same thing about family court.
What is the attitude of the DCFS when confronted with over 3,000 mistakes they made? Spokesman Kendall Marlowe "acknowledged that mistakes are made, but he said the vast majority of people… were placed there properly… he declined further comment."
The DCFS chief administrative law judge Meryl Paniak said "A lot of what happens at these hearings is it becomes a legal process, not… whether it happened or not, but whether enough evidence is presented."
Not a hint of apology, not a whiff of promise to a better job. In one word, arrogant.
DCFS hearings are closed to the public. They admit hearsay evidence. The decisions of their judges are not open to the public. They cannot be sued for mistakes, even when the mistakes are egregious, or downright malicious. The legal standard to which they are held is ridiculously low: the DCFS makes its decisions based only on "credible evidence." In other words, the judges can do pretty much whatever they feel like.
Basically, they are secret courts. Secret courts breed corruption no matter how lofty their reasons sound for being secret. The secret legal proceedings at Guantanamo have caused an uproar, but where is the uproar over the hundreds of thousands of secret proceedings in family court and in child abuse cases?
Sooner or later, this movement is going to have to take on the widespread abuses of the child protective services.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Dear God
Dear God,
Thank you for microwaves, toaster ovens, slow cookers, toasters, convection ovens, rice cookers, coffee makers, and all other appliances that enable meal preparation without the use of natural gas.
And thank you for electricity.
Forever and ever,
Amen
Thank you for microwaves, toaster ovens, slow cookers, toasters, convection ovens, rice cookers, coffee makers, and all other appliances that enable meal preparation without the use of natural gas.
And thank you for electricity.
Forever and ever,
Amen
Monday, May 12, 2008
Sunday, May 11, 2008
My Mothers Day
is AWESOME! I went out with Van and had a REALLY great time last night. I don't know what organs he sold or who he slept with to pay for that dinner but IT WAS AMAZING!
Of course we hit the liquor store afterwards-even though he was paying and told me not to sweat it-there was no way in hell I was ordering another 10 dollar martini. I'm just not that kinda girl ; )~
We went to go see mymommy. And my little brother-whom i have raised as well. And my baby sister made me a BEAUTIFUL CARD! OMG! I LOVE HER SO MUCH!
This morning I was surprised (ambushed!)by van and all the girls. I got breakfast in bed, perfumes, lip gloss, crowns, rings, bracelets, and even scepters! And lovely cards. Jessie really choked me up cuz you could tell she put some thought behind her words. It wasn't your standard "happy mothers day, love you" spiel-it was genuine and beautiful. My babies know all my favorite colors and even my favorite scents!
What means the most is being acknowledged. By my husband, by my sister, by my babies.....I've been taking care of other people my whole life-and i do things because they need to be done. But it's so nice to be NOTICED and SEEN and RECOGNIZED - even if it's only for one day.
Enough of my talking. I'll just show you my joy.
Happy Mother's Day to All!
I hope yours is as wonderful as mine!
Of course we hit the liquor store afterwards-even though he was paying and told me not to sweat it-there was no way in hell I was ordering another 10 dollar martini. I'm just not that kinda girl ; )~
We went to go see mymommy. And my little brother-whom i have raised as well. And my baby sister made me a BEAUTIFUL CARD! OMG! I LOVE HER SO MUCH!
This morning I was surprised (ambushed!)by van and all the girls. I got breakfast in bed, perfumes, lip gloss, crowns, rings, bracelets, and even scepters! And lovely cards. Jessie really choked me up cuz you could tell she put some thought behind her words. It wasn't your standard "happy mothers day, love you" spiel-it was genuine and beautiful. My babies know all my favorite colors and even my favorite scents!
What means the most is being acknowledged. By my husband, by my sister, by my babies.....I've been taking care of other people my whole life-and i do things because they need to be done. But it's so nice to be NOTICED and SEEN and RECOGNIZED - even if it's only for one day.
Enough of my talking. I'll just show you my joy.
Happy Mother's Day to All!
I hope yours is as wonderful as mine!
Saturday, May 10, 2008
dying!!
Van has some top secret surprise plans for me today and I can't figure out what they are! He has thwarted all my secret cracking techniques thus far and I'm DYING! I wanna know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
ok fuckers
everybody that was FOREVER complaining my page took hours to freakin load and it made your crappy pc's crash-i hope you're happy-cuz you should no longer have that problem. i'm still tryna sort this whole "flash" thing out so it's not perfectly the way i want it yet-but it'll get there. and hopefully-it won't take you 45 minutes to load my page anymore. you know what this means don't you? I EXPECT MORE COMMENTS! b/c now there is no excuse. nyah.
Sunday, May 4, 2008
corporal punishment
I am all for corporal punishment. I am emphatically and totally for coporal punishment. Most issues-like, religion, race, politics-pretty much any lifestyle issue-I'm tolerant of. Whatever you do-you do. That's you. I'm me and you're you and thats cool.
But when your offspring behaves like an uncontrollable little asshole-i have a problem with that-b/c it affects my well-behaved offspring.
The latest clinial ivestigations into the human brain show that most people, the average persons brain isn't fully matured and developed into well into their 20's. Not 16. Not 18. Not 21. We're talking 26. And children-having the underdevolped minds that they do have no concept of guilt, responsibilty, honor, or respect. So you can't tell your child-I'm dissapointted in you and expect their behavior to change. It just doesn't work. And alternate discipline stratigies like time-outs or taking priviligies away just cannot compare to the healthy FEAR of a good spanking. "ooooooooh NO-i don't WANT my child to fear me. i want to be their FRIEND." cry me a fucking river. guess what? fear is natural. fear is healthy. fear keeps us SAFE. Whats a better reason to drive slower on a steep curve? What motivates you more? The fact that if you don't obey the posted speed you might get a ticket and be out some of your money? Lose your clubbing or cable money and therefore priviliges for the month? OR THE FACT THAT YOU COULD LOSE CONTROL AND CRASH? AND IT WOULD HURT. REALLY REALLY BAD. YOU COULD DIE. Which are you more "afraid" of? Like i said-fear keeps us healthy. Fear keeps us alive. Pain keeps us alive. We don't frolick in fire and swallow glass and jump off buildings because it WOULD FUCKING HURT. And that fear of that pain keeps us from doing stupid shit.
Fear of a spanking keeps my kids from doing stupid shit. They don't play with the stove cuz they'll get a spanking.(thus saving my house and my life) they don't touch things that aren't theirs w/o permission b/c of fear. (thus saving me the costly expense of replacing a phone or ipod, or computer b/c an irresponsible child broke it) they don't stink. they remember to wipe their asses. brush their teeth. pick up after themselves. they don't throw tantrums or argue with me, privately or publicy because of fear.
trin has been FULLY potty-trained-i mean no pull-ups, no diapers just at bedtime, nothing. since the boy was born. how old was she? 29 months. less than two and a half. not because she wasnted to-but because i stayed on her ass. and whens she had an accident-i was forgiving and understanding-but when she pissed herself out of distraction, laziness, or defiance-she got a spanking.
And i'm sorry if i'm coming off harsh to you. but it's effective. it works. she's not emotionally damaged or more prone to violence. she is respectful and obedient and i don't have to bargain or barter with my child. there is no discussion. i speak and it is done.
i was just reading not too long ago about this private school in illinois. there was a 6 year old boy who was a fucking terror. he wouldn't listen to the teacher. at all. and it went on for a while. and finally the school told his mom-either you come down here and spank this child or he is no longer welcome here. the mom said no. she doesn't hit her child. oh well. now he's expelled. and she's a fucking martyr. except for the fact that he's now in a public school where he can't be expelled and they CAN'T force her to discipline her son and his new teacher is gonna spend ALL of her time distracted chasing this hellion child around while my child is ignored and not getting the education and attention she deserves because this woman "doesn't hit her child". See how this shit effects me?
And please. please. please.
understand the difference between discipline an abuse.
I have never. Bruised or marked my children. Never. Sadistic assholes corrupt the concept of corporal punishment. They hit-not to TEACH. Not as punishment or reprecusssion but out of ANGER. Anger of being inconvienienced or surprised. Or just becuse their own lives are unfulfilled and they need to take out the dissapointment and frustration of being failures SOMEWHERE and have control over SOMETHING. I do not, nor have i or will i EVER ABUSE MY CHILDREN.
But i will DAMN SURE WHOOP SOME ASS!
But when your offspring behaves like an uncontrollable little asshole-i have a problem with that-b/c it affects my well-behaved offspring.
The latest clinial ivestigations into the human brain show that most people, the average persons brain isn't fully matured and developed into well into their 20's. Not 16. Not 18. Not 21. We're talking 26. And children-having the underdevolped minds that they do have no concept of guilt, responsibilty, honor, or respect. So you can't tell your child-I'm dissapointted in you and expect their behavior to change. It just doesn't work. And alternate discipline stratigies like time-outs or taking priviligies away just cannot compare to the healthy FEAR of a good spanking. "ooooooooh NO-i don't WANT my child to fear me. i want to be their FRIEND." cry me a fucking river. guess what? fear is natural. fear is healthy. fear keeps us SAFE. Whats a better reason to drive slower on a steep curve? What motivates you more? The fact that if you don't obey the posted speed you might get a ticket and be out some of your money? Lose your clubbing or cable money and therefore priviliges for the month? OR THE FACT THAT YOU COULD LOSE CONTROL AND CRASH? AND IT WOULD HURT. REALLY REALLY BAD. YOU COULD DIE. Which are you more "afraid" of? Like i said-fear keeps us healthy. Fear keeps us alive. Pain keeps us alive. We don't frolick in fire and swallow glass and jump off buildings because it WOULD FUCKING HURT. And that fear of that pain keeps us from doing stupid shit.
Fear of a spanking keeps my kids from doing stupid shit. They don't play with the stove cuz they'll get a spanking.(thus saving my house and my life) they don't touch things that aren't theirs w/o permission b/c of fear. (thus saving me the costly expense of replacing a phone or ipod, or computer b/c an irresponsible child broke it) they don't stink. they remember to wipe their asses. brush their teeth. pick up after themselves. they don't throw tantrums or argue with me, privately or publicy because of fear.
trin has been FULLY potty-trained-i mean no pull-ups, no diapers just at bedtime, nothing. since the boy was born. how old was she? 29 months. less than two and a half. not because she wasnted to-but because i stayed on her ass. and whens she had an accident-i was forgiving and understanding-but when she pissed herself out of distraction, laziness, or defiance-she got a spanking.
And i'm sorry if i'm coming off harsh to you. but it's effective. it works. she's not emotionally damaged or more prone to violence. she is respectful and obedient and i don't have to bargain or barter with my child. there is no discussion. i speak and it is done.
i was just reading not too long ago about this private school in illinois. there was a 6 year old boy who was a fucking terror. he wouldn't listen to the teacher. at all. and it went on for a while. and finally the school told his mom-either you come down here and spank this child or he is no longer welcome here. the mom said no. she doesn't hit her child. oh well. now he's expelled. and she's a fucking martyr. except for the fact that he's now in a public school where he can't be expelled and they CAN'T force her to discipline her son and his new teacher is gonna spend ALL of her time distracted chasing this hellion child around while my child is ignored and not getting the education and attention she deserves because this woman "doesn't hit her child". See how this shit effects me?
And please. please. please.
understand the difference between discipline an abuse.
I have never. Bruised or marked my children. Never. Sadistic assholes corrupt the concept of corporal punishment. They hit-not to TEACH. Not as punishment or reprecusssion but out of ANGER. Anger of being inconvienienced or surprised. Or just becuse their own lives are unfulfilled and they need to take out the dissapointment and frustration of being failures SOMEWHERE and have control over SOMETHING. I do not, nor have i or will i EVER ABUSE MY CHILDREN.
But i will DAMN SURE WHOOP SOME ASS!
Monday, April 28, 2008
Check me out
Well it looks like the hardest working woman in pharmacy is currently unemployed. At least for the next month. So everyone who I haven't had time to romp and play with for the last year b/c of my ridiculous schedule-whats up? Let's do something with my short-lived freedom!
because mother knows best.....right?
Oh, Rozlynn. Oh, Rozlynn Rodgers.
How could you?
You stupid, stupid whore.
Inflammatory words on the part of People You'll See In Hell? Perhaps. Perhaps not.
19-year-old Rozlynn Rodgers, despite being a grown woman, epitomizes the adolescent self-centered attitude and tendency towards shortsighted behavior. A high school student at Las Casas Occupational High School, an "alternative" high school which, according to their website, serves students whose emotional needs cannot be met in a regular public school setting, Rozlynn Rodgers planned to graduate in June of 2008 with the rest of her class.
It looks like her graduation date might be slightly delayed.
You see, on the afternoon of the 4th of April, 2008, Rozlynn Rodgers gave her 5-month-old daughter, Makalah Rodgers, a bath.
Bathtime can be a fun time, a great way for a new mother or father to bond with their little one. Babies often like to splash their little hands into the bathwater and grab toys that float by. Warm water makes a baby feel good, and probably reminds them somehow of that dark space they were in for 9 months or so.
But what some people would consider a privilege, what some people are desperate to experience, Rozlynn Rodgers considered a burden. For Rozlynn Rodgers, bathtime wasn't fun. Babies weren't fun. Babies were a pain in the ass. Babies keep you from going out and partying. Guys aren't all that into girls who have to stay home and take care of their baby.
Rozlynn Rodgers was tired of it.
So after putting 5-month-old Makalah Rodgers, who might have been learning to sit by herself at this point, into a full bathtub, Rozlynn Rodgers sat and watched as this little tiny human being slipped under the bathwater.
And she watched.
And she watched some more.
Makalah undoubtedly had her eyes open, with her arms outstretched and grasping for something, anything, anyone to pick her up out of the water, to comfort her and make her feel safe. She may have recognized her mother through the haze of the bathwater and opened her mouth to cry for help. Makalah probably thrashed around a good deal while the water poured down her mouth, down her throat and into her lungs.
Makalah Rodgers drowned while Rozlynn Rodgers watched and did nothing but think about all the parties she was now going to be able to attend.
After she was sure that her daughter was dead, Rozlynn told someone else in the house to call 911 while she pulled the corpse of her dead child out of the water.
Police who arrived found a tearful Rozlynn holding her dead child, insisting that she had only stepped away for a moment and come back to find her daughter had drowned.
What a tragedy.
An autopsy was inconclusive, but something the medical examiners found caused police to return to Rozlynn Rodgers on the 22nd of April, 2008 and arrest her. While the cops did so, Rozlynn took the opportunity to let her wild side out and attacked the officers who were arresting her. While sitting in an interview room with a police detective, Rozlynn figured that it would help her case out to attack the detective, knocking over a table before scratching, punching, kicking and spitting in the detective's face.
According to Assistant State's Attorney Mary Anna Planey, who spoke during a bond hearing before Judge Laura Sullivan:
Rozlynn Rodgers told police she didn't want to be a mom anymore because she couldn't go to parties if she had to take care of the baby.
Rozlynn Rodgers has been charged with first-degree murder and aggravated battery to a police officer. She faces life in prison.
She will not be attending any parties anytime soon.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Sunday, April 13, 2008
wow i love my babe
i really, REALLY do.
he's amazing and wonderful and i feel so lucky to be one of those disgusting uber-in love people. i've known the man for almost seven years.
seven.
yes. seven.
and i'm so not bored or tired of him.i don't tire of his stories or jokes (unless i just woke up or i'm pms'ing) i don't resent him, as i have in the past. i truly love him. and i am blessed by how well he fits me and understands me. he's a good father. a wonderful father. the odds were stacked so high against him in court but NEVER gave up no matter how many times they said it'd never happen or the judge didn't show up or the lawyer didn't call back and he came away a winner.
he doesn't lie to me. and we'd both rather spend our time off with EACH OTHER. not at a club or bar or out with friends. with each other. whether it's shopping for laundry soap or watching a movie or drinking and playing the 360-we'd rather be there, together.
no matter how many times i call myself fat or ugly or mommified-he never gives in. he keeps telling me how beautiful and sexy i am.
i love his eyes. his smile. his laugh. i love how he has to make sound effects for everything he does. i love how he'll repeat a phrase he made up or heard over and over and over for a week until it becomes stuck in my head and i can't get it out. i love when he pretends he's a polar bear. i love it when he fights me for the title of "trini's best friend". i love him.
and don't get me wrong. we're not perfect. he annoys the shit outta me sometimes. but i love him so much we let it pass and so rarely fight, it's almost ridiculous.
wow.
i love my babe.
he's amazing and wonderful and i feel so lucky to be one of those disgusting uber-in love people. i've known the man for almost seven years.
seven.
yes. seven.
and i'm so not bored or tired of him.i don't tire of his stories or jokes (unless i just woke up or i'm pms'ing) i don't resent him, as i have in the past. i truly love him. and i am blessed by how well he fits me and understands me. he's a good father. a wonderful father. the odds were stacked so high against him in court but NEVER gave up no matter how many times they said it'd never happen or the judge didn't show up or the lawyer didn't call back and he came away a winner.
he doesn't lie to me. and we'd both rather spend our time off with EACH OTHER. not at a club or bar or out with friends. with each other. whether it's shopping for laundry soap or watching a movie or drinking and playing the 360-we'd rather be there, together.
no matter how many times i call myself fat or ugly or mommified-he never gives in. he keeps telling me how beautiful and sexy i am.
i love his eyes. his smile. his laugh. i love how he has to make sound effects for everything he does. i love how he'll repeat a phrase he made up or heard over and over and over for a week until it becomes stuck in my head and i can't get it out. i love when he pretends he's a polar bear. i love it when he fights me for the title of "trini's best friend". i love him.
and don't get me wrong. we're not perfect. he annoys the shit outta me sometimes. but i love him so much we let it pass and so rarely fight, it's almost ridiculous.
wow.
i love my babe.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
what the effing hell has our generation come to????????
COMMERCE CITY, Colo. -- A couple fighting about which gang their 4-year-old toddler should join caused a public disturbance that resulted in the father's arrest, Commerce City police said Thursday.On Saturday, Joseph Manzanares stormed into the Hollywood Video store where his girlfriend worked, threatened to kill her and knocked over several video displays and even a computer, Commerce City police Sgt. Joe Sandoval said.After he ran out of the store, police were called and the 19-year-old was arrested at his home.
His girlfriend told police that they had been arguing about the upbringing of their son and which gang he should belong to. The teen mother, who is black, is a member of the Crips. Manzanares is Hispanic and belongs to the Westside Ballers gang, the woman said."They have different ideas on how the baby should be raised. Basically, she said they cannot agree on which gang the baby would 'claim,'" Sandoval said.Manzanares was charged with disorderly conduct, harassment, and domestic violence. He was transported to the Adams County Detention Facility.On Tuesday, he pleaded guilty to disorderly conduct and was sentenced to a year of probation. The misdemeanor harassment charge was dropped.
His girlfriend told police that they had been arguing about the upbringing of their son and which gang he should belong to. The teen mother, who is black, is a member of the Crips. Manzanares is Hispanic and belongs to the Westside Ballers gang, the woman said."They have different ideas on how the baby should be raised. Basically, she said they cannot agree on which gang the baby would 'claim,'" Sandoval said.Manzanares was charged with disorderly conduct, harassment, and domestic violence. He was transported to the Adams County Detention Facility.On Tuesday, he pleaded guilty to disorderly conduct and was sentenced to a year of probation. The misdemeanor harassment charge was dropped.
Friday, April 11, 2008
this is an example of the caliber of the stupidity i have to deal with. constantly.
wait. be patient-it doesn't start until about 11 seconds in. but just listen to how STUPID! she is-and she's really, REALLY TRYING to sound smart right here.
and fyi-if you do think that she sounds intelligent and is making sense with phrases such as "due unto", "quotely" and "kiss your regards up your ass"-then you are obviously just as stupid as her and i'm afraid we can no longer be friends.
and fyi-if you do think that she sounds intelligent and is making sense with phrases such as "due unto", "quotely" and "kiss your regards up your ass"-then you are obviously just as stupid as her and i'm afraid we can no longer be friends.
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